![\"post](\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.attorneyatwork.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/post-apocalyptic-law.jpg?resize=770%2C495&ssl=1\" "\\"\\"")
Table of contents<\/h2>\n\n- Post Apocalyptic Law CLE Syllabus<\/a>\n
\n- Fossil Fuel Distribution and Refiner\u2019s Rights in the Mad Max Muscle Car Hellscape, for Rare Earth IP and Natural Resources Attorneys<\/a><\/li>\n
- Power to the People: Individual Rights When We\u2019re All Just Batteries in the Matrix Universe, for Civil Rights Advocates<\/a><\/li>\n
- Tentacles and Tenants\u2019 Rights: Arbitration for Extraterrestrials, for Galactic Immigration Lawyers<\/a><\/li>\n
- Ethics and Customer Service in the Cult of Karen: How to Talk to the Manager when the Manager is a Skull-bedecked Warlord Soccer Mom on Crack<\/a><\/li>\n
- Welcome to the Nerdiverse: Reading Robert\u2019s Rules of Disorder<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n
- FAQs for Post-Apocalyptic Law Courses<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/div>\n
You may have looked at the news lately and thought, \u201cMaybe the preppers are right.\u201d We seem to be hurling into the teeth of the blahpocalypse \u2014 a nightmarish realm of system failure, rapacious greed, income inequality, and a sort of proactive disavowment of intellectualism that appears to be greasing the rails, sending all of us screaming into a New Dark Age.<\/p>\n
Which begs the question: \u201cHow will I practice law after the fall of civilization?<\/strong>\u201c<\/p>\nFortunately, we here at Attorney at Work have a fully staffed Department of IDK devoted to this very type of thing. For your edification, we have produced a course syllabus loaded with dystopian scenarios, soon available from your local continuing legal educational provider.<\/p>\n
Which begs the question: \u201cHow will I get CLE credit?\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\nListen, you\u2019ve trained for this. You are already a fully jacked Dwayne Johnson-esque bureaucratic luchador<\/em> body-slamming your way through the state bar\u2019s byzantine maze to qualify for CLE credit. So you\u2019ll have no problem navigating the tortuous labyrinth leading to the cruel academic underworld to qualify for POST APOCALYPTIC CONTINUING LEGAL EDUCATION CREDIT.<\/p>\nPost Apocalyptic Law CLE Syllabus<\/h2>\nFossil Fuel Distribution and Refiner\u2019s Rights in the Mad Max Muscle Car Hellscape, for Rare Earth IP and Natural Resources Attorneys<\/h3>\n
Navigating this fossil fuel-forward future where the coin of the realm is gasoline may be scary, so you\u2019ll need to rethink rights frameworks. It wouldn\u2019t hurt to hire a handful of SMEs on manufacturing standards in an infernal desert wasteland littered with burned-out Chevrolets and the bones of the weak. What percentage, for instance, of denatured rattlesnake venom can one add to a fuel mixture before it can\u2019t be sold as fuel but becomes, instead, a delightful aperitif? And if the party of the first part adds dehydrated possum drool to the fuel they\u2019re selling to the party of the second part, is one within rights to refer to it as an \u201corganic stabilizing element\u201d? IP law in the new apocalypse will require a new approach. And possibly RPGs for enforcement.<\/p>\n
Power to the People: Individual Rights When We\u2019re All Just Batteries in the Matrix Universe, for Civil Rights Advocates<\/h3>\n
First of all, take the blue pill. Second, that pill is covered by insurance since you work as a battery for The Machines. Taught by James \u201cAgent\u201d Smith, this class will walk you through the basics of representing people who\u2019ve recently discovered they are living in a late \u201990s NYC simulation. Topics include voltage, jack maintenance and security, subterranean property rights, and underground hippie drum circle dance party contracts. Breakout sessions will explore reintegration policies and processes for when your client surveys the cataclysmic crapscape of the Matrix future and screams \u201cPUT ME BACK IN!<\/em>\u201c<\/p>\nTentacles and Tenants\u2019 Rights: Arbitration for Extraterrestrials, for Galactic Immigration Lawyers <\/h3>\n
Fermi\u2019s Paradox is blown apart when an armada of squishy aliens parks their spaceships on the White House Lawn<\/a>. They need a place to hang while their planet is rehabbed, which brings us to landlord-tenant relations, renter\u2019s insurance, tentacle replacement costs, slime removal, and local ordinances. (All the signs need to include sub-Flermian honorifics, and since these aliens are allergic to the number seven, that has to go, or they\u2019ll go into a sneezing fit, and then we\u2019re back to slime removal). Do squatters\u2019 rights apply to space aliens? <\/p>\nEthics and Customer Service in the Cult of Karen: How to Talk to the Manager when the Manager is a Skull-bedecked Warlord Soccer Mom on Crack<\/h3>\n
This class tests your negotiation skills through a collection of scenarios wherein you, a post-apocalyptic desert warrior, find yourself in a burned-out Target looking for a new compound bow and a hatchet. In scenario A, a clerk walks up to you and says, \u201cMa\u2019am, we\u2019re gonna need you to use headphones if you\u2019re gonna listen to early \u201980s Ska.\u201d Obviously, you give the ritualistic response of your people, \u201cI\u2019d like to talk to your manager.\u201d You are then escorted to the killing floor where you and a third-shift supervisor named Steve fill your fists with rusty machetes and shields made from the hubcap of a 1974 Dodge Charger. Course director, Dr. Professor Carole \u201cYes, I am recording this\u201d Karen walks you through hand-to-hand negotiating techniques with bonus material, including her secret recipe for squirrel jerky.<\/p>\n
Welcome to the Nerdiverse: Reading Robert\u2019s Rules of Disorder<\/h3>\n
Probably the most likely dystopian future is one in which grammar Nazis and policy wags take over simply because no one else showed up to vote in an HOA meeting. This class covers change management for control freaks, how to be persnickety, outlying uses of the Oxford comma, single spacing after a period, proper implementation of the Cambridge semi-colon, how to second a motion quickly before Steve (because that MF always seconds a motion first and it pisses you off), seating arrangements for psychopaths, competitive gaveling, and post-crash best practices for bullet points. With real bullets.<\/p>\n
FAQs for Post-Apocalyptic Law Courses<\/h2>\n
Yes. Team discounts are available for AI agents.<\/p>\n
Yes. The slides will be available AFTER the session, Barbara!<\/p>\n
No. You can\u2019t \u2018seventh\u2019 a motion, James.<\/p>\n
Yes. Most schools will accept squirrel jerky in lieu of gasoline for payment.<\/p>\n
Yes. Leonard, you may write your thesis in the blood of your enemies as long as they aren\u2019t the enemies in this class.<\/p>\n
Yes. It is a very lovely day.<\/p>\n
No. You can\u2019t \u2018eighth\u2019 a motion, James.<\/p>\n
Yes. We can hear you, Steve.<\/p>\n
Image \u00a9 iStockPhoto.com. <\/p>\n
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<\/a><\/figure>\n\nDon\u2019t miss out on our daily practice management tips.<\/strong> Subscribe to Attorney at Work\u2019s free newsletter <\/strong>here ><\/strong><\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
- \n
- Fossil Fuel Distribution and Refiner\u2019s Rights in the Mad Max Muscle Car Hellscape, for Rare Earth IP and Natural Resources Attorneys<\/a><\/li>\n
- Power to the People: Individual Rights When We\u2019re All Just Batteries in the Matrix Universe, for Civil Rights Advocates<\/a><\/li>\n
- Tentacles and Tenants\u2019 Rights: Arbitration for Extraterrestrials, for Galactic Immigration Lawyers<\/a><\/li>\n
- Ethics and Customer Service in the Cult of Karen: How to Talk to the Manager when the Manager is a Skull-bedecked Warlord Soccer Mom on Crack<\/a><\/li>\n
- Welcome to the Nerdiverse: Reading Robert\u2019s Rules of Disorder<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n
- FAQs for Post-Apocalyptic Law Courses<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/div>\n
You may have looked at the news lately and thought, \u201cMaybe the preppers are right.\u201d We seem to be hurling into the teeth of the blahpocalypse \u2014 a nightmarish realm of system failure, rapacious greed, income inequality, and a sort of proactive disavowment of intellectualism that appears to be greasing the rails, sending all of us screaming into a New Dark Age.<\/p>\n
Which begs the question: \u201cHow will I practice law after the fall of civilization?<\/strong>\u201c<\/p>\n
Fortunately, we here at Attorney at Work have a fully staffed Department of IDK devoted to this very type of thing. For your edification, we have produced a course syllabus loaded with dystopian scenarios, soon available from your local continuing legal educational provider.<\/p>\n
Which begs the question: \u201cHow will I get CLE credit?\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n
Listen, you\u2019ve trained for this. You are already a fully jacked Dwayne Johnson-esque bureaucratic luchador<\/em> body-slamming your way through the state bar\u2019s byzantine maze to qualify for CLE credit. So you\u2019ll have no problem navigating the tortuous labyrinth leading to the cruel academic underworld to qualify for POST APOCALYPTIC CONTINUING LEGAL EDUCATION CREDIT.<\/p>\n
Post Apocalyptic Law CLE Syllabus<\/h2>\n
Fossil Fuel Distribution and Refiner\u2019s Rights in the Mad Max Muscle Car Hellscape, for Rare Earth IP and Natural Resources Attorneys<\/h3>\n
Navigating this fossil fuel-forward future where the coin of the realm is gasoline may be scary, so you\u2019ll need to rethink rights frameworks. It wouldn\u2019t hurt to hire a handful of SMEs on manufacturing standards in an infernal desert wasteland littered with burned-out Chevrolets and the bones of the weak. What percentage, for instance, of denatured rattlesnake venom can one add to a fuel mixture before it can\u2019t be sold as fuel but becomes, instead, a delightful aperitif? And if the party of the first part adds dehydrated possum drool to the fuel they\u2019re selling to the party of the second part, is one within rights to refer to it as an \u201corganic stabilizing element\u201d? IP law in the new apocalypse will require a new approach. And possibly RPGs for enforcement.<\/p>\n
Power to the People: Individual Rights When We\u2019re All Just Batteries in the Matrix Universe, for Civil Rights Advocates<\/h3>\n
First of all, take the blue pill. Second, that pill is covered by insurance since you work as a battery for The Machines. Taught by James \u201cAgent\u201d Smith, this class will walk you through the basics of representing people who\u2019ve recently discovered they are living in a late \u201990s NYC simulation. Topics include voltage, jack maintenance and security, subterranean property rights, and underground hippie drum circle dance party contracts. Breakout sessions will explore reintegration policies and processes for when your client surveys the cataclysmic crapscape of the Matrix future and screams \u201cPUT ME BACK IN!<\/em>\u201c<\/p>\n
Tentacles and Tenants\u2019 Rights: Arbitration for Extraterrestrials, for Galactic Immigration Lawyers <\/h3>\n
Fermi\u2019s Paradox is blown apart when an armada of squishy aliens parks their spaceships on the White House Lawn<\/a>. They need a place to hang while their planet is rehabbed, which brings us to landlord-tenant relations, renter\u2019s insurance, tentacle replacement costs, slime removal, and local ordinances. (All the signs need to include sub-Flermian honorifics, and since these aliens are allergic to the number seven, that has to go, or they\u2019ll go into a sneezing fit, and then we\u2019re back to slime removal). Do squatters\u2019 rights apply to space aliens? <\/p>\n
Ethics and Customer Service in the Cult of Karen: How to Talk to the Manager when the Manager is a Skull-bedecked Warlord Soccer Mom on Crack<\/h3>\n
This class tests your negotiation skills through a collection of scenarios wherein you, a post-apocalyptic desert warrior, find yourself in a burned-out Target looking for a new compound bow and a hatchet. In scenario A, a clerk walks up to you and says, \u201cMa\u2019am, we\u2019re gonna need you to use headphones if you\u2019re gonna listen to early \u201980s Ska.\u201d Obviously, you give the ritualistic response of your people, \u201cI\u2019d like to talk to your manager.\u201d You are then escorted to the killing floor where you and a third-shift supervisor named Steve fill your fists with rusty machetes and shields made from the hubcap of a 1974 Dodge Charger. Course director, Dr. Professor Carole \u201cYes, I am recording this\u201d Karen walks you through hand-to-hand negotiating techniques with bonus material, including her secret recipe for squirrel jerky.<\/p>\n
Welcome to the Nerdiverse: Reading Robert\u2019s Rules of Disorder<\/h3>\n
Probably the most likely dystopian future is one in which grammar Nazis and policy wags take over simply because no one else showed up to vote in an HOA meeting. This class covers change management for control freaks, how to be persnickety, outlying uses of the Oxford comma, single spacing after a period, proper implementation of the Cambridge semi-colon, how to second a motion quickly before Steve (because that MF always seconds a motion first and it pisses you off), seating arrangements for psychopaths, competitive gaveling, and post-crash best practices for bullet points. With real bullets.<\/p>\n
FAQs for Post-Apocalyptic Law Courses<\/h2>\n
Yes. Team discounts are available for AI agents.<\/p>\n
Yes. The slides will be available AFTER the session, Barbara!<\/p>\n
No. You can\u2019t \u2018seventh\u2019 a motion, James.<\/p>\n
Yes. Most schools will accept squirrel jerky in lieu of gasoline for payment.<\/p>\n
Yes. Leonard, you may write your thesis in the blood of your enemies as long as they aren\u2019t the enemies in this class.<\/p>\n
Yes. It is a very lovely day.<\/p>\n
No. You can\u2019t \u2018eighth\u2019 a motion, James.<\/p>\n
Yes. We can hear you, Steve.<\/p>\n
Image \u00a9 iStockPhoto.com. <\/p>\n
\n<\/a><\/figure>\n\nDon\u2019t miss out on our daily practice management tips.<\/strong> Subscribe to Attorney at Work\u2019s free newsletter <\/strong>here ><\/strong><\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
- Power to the People: Individual Rights When We\u2019re All Just Batteries in the Matrix Universe, for Civil Rights Advocates<\/a><\/li>\n
![\"Analog](\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.attorneyatwork.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/A-Pencil-as-a-Status-Symbol.jpg?resize=770%2C495&ssl=1\" "\\"\\"")
<\/a><\/figure>\n