{"id":127625,"date":"2025-07-22T08:07:07","date_gmt":"2025-07-22T16:07:07","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/2025\/07\/22\/reading-trumps-mind-the-epstein-files\/"},"modified":"2025-07-22T08:07:07","modified_gmt":"2025-07-22T16:07:07","slug":"reading-trumps-mind-the-epstein-files","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/2025\/07\/22\/reading-trumps-mind-the-epstein-files\/","title":{"rendered":"Reading Trump\u2019s Mind: The Epstein Files"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"\"
<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

What was Donald Trump thinking about the Jeffrey Epstein files?<\/p>\n

Maybe this:<\/p>\n

It\u2019s the middle of 2024, and the Epstein files are important to my presidential campaign.\u00a0My base thinks the files will prove that Democratic pedophiles run the country.\u00a0I\u2019m supposed to release the files, expose the pedophiles, and cleanse the country of the Democratic elite cabal.<\/p>\n

Does anyone really believe that crap?\u00a0Thank God for QAnon.<\/p>\n

Anyway, I realize there\u2019s a bunch of stuff in the Epstein files that makes me look pretty bad.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

The heck with it!\u00a0I\u2019ll commit to release the files anyway.\u00a0Maybe folks will have forgotten about Epstein by the time I\u2019m inaugurated.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s now the summer of 2025, and people still remember the Epstein files.<\/p>\n

What can I say now to avoid releasing the files, which contain that incriminating material?<\/p>\n

Maybe I\u2019ll say that we can\u2019t release the files because they contain second- and third-hand information that may damage the reputation of innocent people.<\/p>\n

Wait a minute; no one will believe that.\u00a0Have you seen how much I care about the reputations of innocent people?\u00a0Hell, I\u2019ve been ordered to pay tens of millions of dollars to E. Jean Carroll for having defamed her.\u00a0I\u2019m not sure I should talk about protecting the reputations of innocent people.<\/p>\n

What else can I say to avoid releasing the files?<\/p>\n

Maybe I should say that the files will unfairly incriminate people.\u00a0No.\u00a0My base knows that the files are incriminating; that\u2019s why people want to see the damn things.\u00a0That won\u2019t work.<\/p>\n

Maybe I should say that I can\u2019t release the Epstein files because they contain the names of underage victims of sexual abuse.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

I don\u2019t really care about underage girls.\u00a0I used to go strolling around the\u00a0dressing room<\/a>\u00a0of a Miss Teenage America pageant.\u00a0But I\u2019m not sure that excuse will work.\u00a0If anyone really cares about young victims of sexual abuse, we could just redact the names of the children.<\/p>\n

I guess there\u2019s only one thing for me to do:\u00a0Deny that there\u2019s anything interesting in the Epstein files.\u00a0My base will probably believe me \u2014 God, I love the deplorables! \u2014 and that will put the whole issue behind me.<\/p>\n

Shoot!\u00a0People aren\u2019t believing me.\u00a0They still want to see the files.\u00a0I guess we\u2019ve been talking about Epstein for too long.\u00a0Even my base isn\u2019t stupid enough to let me renege on my promise to release the files.\u00a0And now the Democrats are piling on.\u00a0What will I do?<\/p>\n

Maybe I should say that I can\u2019t release the Epstein files because they contain secret grand jury materials.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

I sure don\u2019t give a damn about grand jury materials.\u00a0What the hell\u2019s a grand jury, anyway?\u00a0Besides, I\u2019m immune from criminal prosecution, so they can\u2019t prosecute me if I illegally release grand jury materials.<\/p>\n

But I don\u2019t even have to release the stuff!\u00a0I\u2019ll tell Pam Bondi to release \u201cgrand jury testimony,\u201d if courts authorize it.\u00a0The courts may not authorize it.\u00a0Even if they do, the grand jury would have investigated only Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwell; prosecutors wouldn\u2019t have asked any questions about me.\u00a0So long as we release only \u201cgrand jury testimony,\u201d and not the \u201cEpstein files,\u201d I\u2019m probably okay.<\/p>\n

Shoot!\u00a0The Wall Street Journal<\/em>\u00a0is about to report on the birthday note that I allegedly sent to Epstein that suggests that I might allegedly know about his fondness for underage girls. What will I do now?<\/p>\n

I\u2019ll have my thugs call Rupert Murdoch and tell him not to publish!<\/p>\n

Didn\u2019t work.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ll have my thugs call the editor at the\u00a0Journal<\/em>\u00a0and demand that she not publish!<\/p>\n

Didn\u2019t work.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ll threaten to sue the\u00a0Journal<\/em>!\u00a0(I know that\u2019s ridiculous, because a lawsuit would only draw attention to the issue, and discovery in the lawsuit would be horribly embarrassing to me, but what can I do?\u00a0You have to threaten to sue, and generally follow through, to avoid looking weak.)<\/p>\n

That didn\u2019t work either.<\/p>\n

What do I do now?<\/p>\n

Fake news!<\/p>\n

Anything that doesn\u2019t flatter me is always fake news.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s a bifurcated world:\u00a0There\u2019s only flattering news and fake news.\u00a0There are only judges who rule in my favor and judges who are corrupt, communist Democrats.\u00a0I\u2019ll just use the old fake news ploy:\u00a0I\u2019ll insist the birthday note to Epstein is a fake!<\/p>\n

This\u2019ll be tricky to pull off. The note is included with a bunch of others in a book that celebrated Epstein\u2019s 50th birthday.\u00a0The company that published the book probably has evidence that the contributors actually sent in their contributions.\u00a0Scores of people who wrote other notes for Jeff will probably concede that their notes are real.\u00a0Is my alleged note the only fake note?\u00a0Who faked it, and when?\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

Jesus \u2014 Ghislaine Maxwell assembled the book for Jeff, and she\u2019s still alive.\u00a0She could testify that she didn\u2019t concoct stuff to put in the book.<\/p>\n

Screw it.\u00a0Who gives a damn?<\/p>\n

I\u2019m gonna insist that the\u00a0Journal<\/em>\u00a0concocted the note and somehow placed it in a book that was published 20 years ago.\u00a0Maybe they knew I\u2019d be elected president.\u00a0Or maybe Obama, or Biden, or Comey concocted the note.<\/p>\n

I haven\u2019t worked this out yet, but one of those things should work.<\/p>\n

What if they don\u2019t work?\u00a0Even my base might not be that stupid.<\/p>\n

I guess, in the end, it won\u2019t matter.\u00a0I\u2019ve been found liable for sexual assault (which, in the common meaning of the words, constituted rape).\u00a0 I\u2019ve been accused of sexual assault by dozens of other women.\u00a0My voice is on tape talking about grabbing women by the pussy.\u00a0The whole world knows about Stormy Daniels.<\/p>\n

None of that made any difference.<\/p>\n

So the birthday note will be made public, and every thinking person will know that it\u2019s real.<\/p>\n

Of course it\u2019s not just the note.<\/p>\n

Epstein and I were \u201cbest friends<\/a>\u201d for a long, long time.<\/p>\n

I fought pretty damn hard to keep the entire Epstein file from being made public, so there\u2019s probably some other incriminating stuff in there, too.<\/p>\n

The hell with it; I\u2019ll be incriminated.<\/p>\n

I can\u2019t be prosecuted, even if there\u2019s evidence of criminality in the files.\u00a0<\/p>\n

The Republicans in Congress sure aren\u2019t going to impeach me over this.<\/p>\n

I guess I\u2019ll just have a stain on my reputation.<\/p>\n

Another stain on my reputation?\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

I don\u2019t even care if that\u2019s fake news.\u00a0It\u2019s basically no news at all.<\/p>\n

\n

Mark\u00a0Herrmann\u00a0spent 17 years as a partner at a leading international law firm and later oversaw litigation, compliance and employment matters at a large international company. He is the author of\u00a0<\/em><\/strong>The Curmudgeon\u2019s Guide to Practicing Law<\/em><\/strong><\/a>\u00a0and\u00a0<\/em><\/strong>Drug and Device Product Liability Litigation Strategy<\/em><\/strong><\/a>\u00a0(affiliate links). You can reach him by email at\u00a0<\/em><\/strong>inhouse@abovethelaw.com<\/em><\/strong><\/a>.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

The post Reading Trump\u2019s Mind: The Epstein Files<\/a> appeared first on Above the Law<\/a>.<\/p>\n

\"\"
<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

What was Donald Trump thinking about the Jeffrey Epstein files?<\/p>\n

Maybe this:<\/p>\n

It\u2019s the middle of 2024, and the Epstein files are important to my presidential campaign.\u00a0My base thinks the files will prove that Democratic pedophiles run the country.\u00a0I\u2019m supposed to release the files, expose the pedophiles, and cleanse the country of the Democratic elite cabal.<\/p>\n

Does anyone really believe that crap?\u00a0Thank God for QAnon.<\/p>\n

Anyway, I realize there\u2019s a bunch of stuff in the Epstein files that makes me look pretty bad.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

The heck with it!\u00a0I\u2019ll commit to release the files anyway.\u00a0Maybe folks will have forgotten about Epstein by the time I\u2019m inaugurated.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s now the summer of 2025, and people still remember the Epstein files.<\/p>\n

What can I say now to avoid releasing the files, which contain that incriminating material?<\/p>\n

Maybe I\u2019ll say that we can\u2019t release the files because they contain second- and third-hand information that may damage the reputation of innocent people.<\/p>\n

Wait a minute; no one will believe that.\u00a0Have you seen how much I care about the reputations of innocent people?\u00a0Hell, I\u2019ve been ordered to pay tens of millions of dollars to E. Jean Carroll for having defamed her.\u00a0I\u2019m not sure I should talk about protecting the reputations of innocent people.<\/p>\n

What else can I say to avoid releasing the files?<\/p>\n

Maybe I should say that the files will unfairly incriminate people.\u00a0No.\u00a0My base knows that the files are incriminating; that\u2019s why people want to see the damn things.\u00a0That won\u2019t work.<\/p>\n

Maybe I should say that I can\u2019t release the Epstein files because they contain the names of underage victims of sexual abuse.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

I don\u2019t really care about underage girls.\u00a0I used to go strolling around the\u00a0dressing room<\/a>\u00a0of a Miss Teenage America pageant.\u00a0But I\u2019m not sure that excuse will work.\u00a0If anyone really cares about young victims of sexual abuse, we could just redact the names of the children.<\/p>\n

I guess there\u2019s only one thing for me to do:\u00a0Deny that there\u2019s anything interesting in the Epstein files.\u00a0My base will probably believe me \u2014 God, I love the deplorables! \u2014 and that will put the whole issue behind me.<\/p>\n

Shoot!\u00a0People aren\u2019t believing me.\u00a0They still want to see the files.\u00a0I guess we\u2019ve been talking about Epstein for too long.\u00a0Even my base isn\u2019t stupid enough to let me renege on my promise to release the files.\u00a0And now the Democrats are piling on.\u00a0What will I do?<\/p>\n

Maybe I should say that I can\u2019t release the Epstein files because they contain secret grand jury materials.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

I sure don\u2019t give a damn about grand jury materials.\u00a0What the hell\u2019s a grand jury, anyway?\u00a0Besides, I\u2019m immune from criminal prosecution, so they can\u2019t prosecute me if I illegally release grand jury materials.<\/p>\n

But I don\u2019t even have to release the stuff!\u00a0I\u2019ll tell Pam Bondi to release \u201cgrand jury testimony,\u201d if courts authorize it.\u00a0The courts may not authorize it.\u00a0Even if they do, the grand jury would have investigated only Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwell; prosecutors wouldn\u2019t have asked any questions about me.\u00a0So long as we release only \u201cgrand jury testimony,\u201d and not the \u201cEpstein files,\u201d I\u2019m probably okay.<\/p>\n

Shoot!\u00a0The Wall Street Journal<\/em>\u00a0is about to report on the birthday note that I allegedly sent to Epstein that suggests that I might allegedly know about his fondness for underage girls. What will I do now?<\/p>\n

I\u2019ll have my thugs call Rupert Murdoch and tell him not to publish!<\/p>\n

Didn\u2019t work.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ll have my thugs call the editor at the\u00a0Journal<\/em>\u00a0and demand that she not publish!<\/p>\n

Didn\u2019t work.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ll threaten to sue the\u00a0Journal<\/em>!\u00a0(I know that\u2019s ridiculous, because a lawsuit would only draw attention to the issue, and discovery in the lawsuit would be horribly embarrassing to me, but what can I do?\u00a0You have to threaten to sue, and generally follow through, to avoid looking weak.)<\/p>\n

That didn\u2019t work either.<\/p>\n

What do I do now?<\/p>\n

Fake news!<\/p>\n

Anything that doesn\u2019t flatter me is always fake news.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s a bifurcated world:\u00a0There\u2019s only flattering news and fake news.\u00a0There are only judges who rule in my favor and judges who are corrupt, communist Democrats.\u00a0I\u2019ll just use the old fake news ploy:\u00a0I\u2019ll insist the birthday note to Epstein is a fake!<\/p>\n

This\u2019ll be tricky to pull off. The note is included with a bunch of others in a book that celebrated Epstein\u2019s 50th birthday.\u00a0The company that published the book probably has evidence that the contributors actually sent in their contributions.\u00a0Scores of people who wrote other notes for Jeff will probably concede that their notes are real.\u00a0Is my alleged note the only fake note?\u00a0Who faked it, and when?\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

Jesus \u2014 Ghislaine Maxwell assembled the book for Jeff, and she\u2019s still alive.\u00a0She could testify that she didn\u2019t concoct stuff to put in the book.<\/p>\n

Screw it.\u00a0Who gives a damn?<\/p>\n

I\u2019m gonna insist that the\u00a0Journal<\/em>\u00a0concocted the note and somehow placed it in a book that was published 20 years ago.\u00a0Maybe they knew I\u2019d be elected president.\u00a0Or maybe Obama, or Biden, or Comey concocted the note.<\/p>\n

I haven\u2019t worked this out yet, but one of those things should work.<\/p>\n

What if they don\u2019t work?\u00a0Even my base might not be that stupid.<\/p>\n

I guess, in the end, it won\u2019t matter.\u00a0I\u2019ve been found liable for sexual assault (which, in the common meaning of the words, constituted rape).\u00a0 I\u2019ve been accused of sexual assault by dozens of other women.\u00a0My voice is on tape talking about grabbing women by the pussy.\u00a0The whole world knows about Stormy Daniels.<\/p>\n

None of that made any difference.<\/p>\n

So the birthday note will be made public, and every thinking person will know that it\u2019s real.<\/p>\n

Of course it\u2019s not just the note.<\/p>\n

Epstein and I were \u201cbest friends<\/a>\u201d for a long, long time.<\/p>\n

I fought pretty damn hard to keep the entire Epstein file from being made public, so there\u2019s probably some other incriminating stuff in there, too.<\/p>\n

The hell with it; I\u2019ll be incriminated.<\/p>\n

I can\u2019t be prosecuted, even if there\u2019s evidence of criminality in the files.\u00a0<\/p>\n

The Republicans in Congress sure aren\u2019t going to impeach me over this.<\/p>\n

I guess I\u2019ll just have a stain on my reputation.<\/p>\n

Another stain on my reputation?\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

I don\u2019t even care if that\u2019s fake news.\u00a0It\u2019s basically no news at all.<\/p>\n

\n

Mark\u00a0Herrmann\u00a0spent 17 years as a partner at a leading international law firm and later oversaw litigation, compliance and employment matters at a large international company. He is the author of\u00a0<\/em><\/strong>The Curmudgeon\u2019s Guide to Practicing Law<\/em><\/strong><\/a>\u00a0and\u00a0<\/em><\/strong>Drug and Device Product Liability Litigation Strategy<\/em><\/strong><\/a>\u00a0(affiliate links). You can reach him by email at\u00a0<\/em><\/strong>inhouse@abovethelaw.com<\/em><\/strong><\/a>.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

The post Reading Trump\u2019s Mind: The Epstein Files<\/a> appeared first on Above the Law<\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

What was Donald Trump thinking about the Jeffrey Epstein files? Maybe this: It\u2019s the middle of 2024, and the Epstein files are important to my presidential campaign.\u00a0My base thinks the files will prove that Democratic pedophiles run the country.\u00a0I\u2019m supposed to release the files, expose the pedophiles, and cleanse the country of the Democratic elite […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":127541,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[16],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-127625","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-above_the_law"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/xira.com\/p\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/07\/Screen-Shot-2019-07-08-at-3.51.18-PM-9EiWXv.png?fit=503%2C396&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/127625","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=127625"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/127625\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/127541"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=127625"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=127625"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=127625"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}