{"id":135119,"date":"2025-10-14T14:03:54","date_gmt":"2025-10-14T22:03:54","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/2025\/10\/14\/teaching-law-in-a-red-state\/"},"modified":"2025-10-14T14:03:54","modified_gmt":"2025-10-14T22:03:54","slug":"teaching-law-in-a-red-state","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/2025\/10\/14\/teaching-law-in-a-red-state\/","title":{"rendered":"Teaching Law In A Red State"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"\"
<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Dear Colleagues,<\/p>\n

We at University Administration are now prepared to issue our Academic Freedom guidelines for your classes.\u00a0As you know from last year\u2019s memo, we in administration are strong advocates of free speech on campus.\u00a0With some guidance from us, we believe you will feel more empowered to speak your mind, with proper limits.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

While the previous provost, president, and general counsel have \u201cresigned,\u201d we assure you our commitment to education remains steadfast.\u00a0The new president even helped draft the law titled \u201cDe-Woke the Campus for Academic Freedom Act.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

With your help, we can ensure the campus has vibrant and open discourse about subjects that do not matter to anyone.<\/p>\n

REGULATIONS FOR THE EMPOWERMENT OF TEACHING<\/strong><\/p>\n

Recording Policy:<\/strong>\u00a0Your syllabus must read as follows:\u201cStudents are encouraged to record my class.\u00a0Where appropriate, students may submit my class session to administrative officials and the appropriate Turning Points USA chapter and to the Professor Watchlist<\/a>.\u00a0Students will be held harmless in the event of my receipt of death threats or wrongful termination.\u201d<\/p>\n

Preferred Names:<\/strong>\u00a0Your syllabus must read as follows: \u201cI will address you by your preferred name, so long as it has nothing to do with LGBTQ+ issues and does not involve transgender identity.\u00a0Thus, if you are Matthew, I\u2019ll still call you Matt, if you want.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

Note: We don\u2019t want to make Matt uncomfortable.\u00a0His dad\u2019s a donor.<\/em><\/p>\n

Course Names:<\/strong> If your course name appears controversial, we encourage you to change it.\u00a0For example, if you teach \u201cAbortion Law,\u201d please consider naming it \u201cAbortion is Wrong and the Law.\u201d\u00a0If you teach \u201cFamily Law,\u201d consider naming it \u201cNuclear Family Law.\u201d<\/p>\n

Course Topics:<\/strong> Please ensure that your course description and course assignments closely match.\u00a0Otherwise, you risk disciplinary action.\u00a0For example, in the course \u201cConstitutional Law,\u201d stop assigning the dissent.\u00a0That\u2019s just some liberal\u2019s view, not the law.\u00a0Also, do not use cases that relate to university conduct, as the Board views that as a direct threat.<\/p>\n

Controversial Topics:<\/strong>\u00a0Please avoid controversial topics.\u00a0For example, if you teach \u201cInternational Law,\u201d please do not use the words \u201cwar crimes,\u201d \u201cgenocide,\u201d \u201cICC,\u201d \u201cThe Hague,\u201d or \u201cinternational law\u201d in your course assignments.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

Also, we\u2019ve taken the liberty of eliminating some courses that are de facto controversial and cannot be taught. That includes \u201cWomen and the Law,\u201d \u201cCritical Race Theory,\u201d \u201cFirst Amendment Law,\u201d and \u201cWater Law\u201d (the governor is big into AI).\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

You\u2019ll probably notice we no longer teach \u201cTransgender Law,\u201d and the dean and professor who authorized that course have been fired.\u00a0Your new dean, as you know, is a former legislator and proud author of the \u201cBathroom Bill.\u201d<\/p>\n

If your course offends someone on the basis that our great United States is not a meritocracy, your course is canceled. Thus, we will no longer be teaching courses in \u201cEmployment Discrimination\u201d or \u201cCivil Rights Law.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

If you teach \u201cFamily Law,\u201d please ensure that all cases involve a traditional nuclear family.\u00a0<\/p>\n

For your interdisciplinary \u201cHistory and the Law\u201d course, avoid mention that Nazi Germany brutally vilified and tortured the LGBTQ+ community<\/a> in ways similar to the United States southern states today.\u00a0Avoid mention that Nazi Germany targeted communists.\u00a0Do not mention that anti-fascists fought fascism.\u00a0Our state legislators have a hard time understanding the difference between antifa, communism, and fascism, as the high school history courses in this state were destroyed 30 years ago.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

If you teach \u201cBankruptcy Law\u201d or \u201cTax Law,\u201d avoid commentary related to the impact of tariffs on the economy.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

Controversial Words:\u00a0<\/strong>To avoid misunderstanding and triggering of unfortunate termination proceedings, please avoid the words \u201ctrans,\u201d \u201ctransatlantic,\u201d \u201ctransoceanic,\u201d \u201ctransportation,\u201d and \u201cTransylvania.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

Controversial Club Sponsorship:\u00a0<\/strong>Please avoid sponsoring controversial clubs. Such club names include \u201cLGBTQ+ Outlaw Club,\u201d \u201cCritical Race Theory Study Group,\u201d or \u201cRights for Everyone Club.\u201d Sponsorship of the \u201cTPUSA Chapter\u201d and \u201cCharlie Kirk Worship Club\u201d is strongly encouraged.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

Accuracy of Materials:\u00a0<\/strong>Please ensure your choices of materials is accurate but balanced. For example, if you teach a \u201cHealth Law\u201d course, please balance your assignment of peer-reviewed resources that demonstrate that vaccines do not cause autism with at least one non-peer-reviewed resource, preferably ones endorsed by RFK Jr.\u00a0Under no circumstances are you to quote Charlie Kirk, as we are unsure as to the accuracy of any of his quotes.<\/p>\n

Clinics:\u00a0<\/strong>The Immigration Law clinic will be repurposed to require mandatory service in ICE to get a better understanding of how immigration works on the ground and not in the ivory tower of academia. Being improperly arrested by ICE will not count toward service hours.<\/p>\n

Faculty Bios and CVs:\u00a0<\/strong>Please ensure that your bios and CVs do not have any reference to preferred pronouns, any work you have done for LGBTQ+ causes, or any \u201cleft leaning\u201d causes such as the Federalist Society.\u00a0We also encourage, but do not require, donations to a right-wing conservative candidate of over $200 or more to demonstrate faculty intellectual diversity.<\/p>\n

DEI: <\/strong>Thanks to a generous grant from the Koch Foundation, we have established a \u201cDrug Enforcement and ICE\u201d (DEI) program that examines the positive ways ICE interacts with our communities.\u00a0All DEI links will now automatically repost there.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

Thank you all for your attention to this matter!<\/p>\n

Administration<\/p>\n

\n

LawProfBlawg<\/em><\/strong><\/a>\u00a0is an anonymous\u00a0law\u00a0professor. Follow him on\u00a0X\/Twitter\/whatever\u00a0(<\/em><\/strong>@lawprofblawg<\/em><\/strong><\/a>). He\u2019s also on BlueSky, Mastodon, and Threads depending on his mood.\u00a0Email him at\u00a0<\/em><\/strong>lawprofblawg@gmail.com<\/em><\/strong><\/a>.\u00a0 The views of this blog post do not represent the views of his employer, his employer\u2019s government, his Dean, his colleagues, his family, or himself.\u00a0 This piece is satire, hopefully.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

The post Teaching Law In A Red State<\/a> appeared first on Above the Law<\/a>.<\/p>\n

\"\"
<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Dear Colleagues,<\/p>\n

We at University Administration are now prepared to issue our Academic Freedom guidelines for your classes.\u00a0As you know from last year\u2019s memo, we in administration are strong advocates of free speech on campus.\u00a0With some guidance from us, we believe you will feel more empowered to speak your mind, with proper limits.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

While the previous provost, president, and general counsel have \u201cresigned,\u201d we assure you our commitment to education remains steadfast.\u00a0The new president even helped draft the law titled \u201cDe-Woke the Campus for Academic Freedom Act.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

With your help, we can ensure the campus has vibrant and open discourse about subjects that do not matter to anyone.<\/p>\n

REGULATIONS FOR THE EMPOWERMENT OF TEACHING<\/strong><\/p>\n

Recording Policy:<\/strong>\u00a0Your syllabus must read as follows:\u201cStudents are encouraged to record my class.\u00a0Where appropriate, students may submit my class session to administrative officials and the appropriate Turning Points USA chapter and to the Professor Watchlist<\/a>.\u00a0Students will be held harmless in the event of my receipt of death threats or wrongful termination.\u201d<\/p>\n

Preferred Names:<\/strong>\u00a0Your syllabus must read as follows: \u201cI will address you by your preferred name, so long as it has nothing to do with LGBTQ+ issues and does not involve transgender identity.\u00a0Thus, if you are Matthew, I\u2019ll still call you Matt, if you want.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

Note: We don\u2019t want to make Matt uncomfortable.\u00a0His dad\u2019s a donor.<\/em><\/p>\n

Course Names:<\/strong> If your course name appears controversial, we encourage you to change it.\u00a0For example, if you teach \u201cAbortion Law,\u201d please consider naming it \u201cAbortion is Wrong and the Law.\u201d\u00a0If you teach \u201cFamily Law,\u201d consider naming it \u201cNuclear Family Law.\u201d<\/p>\n

Course Topics:<\/strong> Please ensure that your course description and course assignments closely match.\u00a0Otherwise, you risk disciplinary action.\u00a0For example, in the course \u201cConstitutional Law,\u201d stop assigning the dissent.\u00a0That\u2019s just some liberal\u2019s view, not the law.\u00a0Also, do not use cases that relate to university conduct, as the Board views that as a direct threat.<\/p>\n

Controversial Topics:<\/strong>\u00a0Please avoid controversial topics.\u00a0For example, if you teach \u201cInternational Law,\u201d please do not use the words \u201cwar crimes,\u201d \u201cgenocide,\u201d \u201cICC,\u201d \u201cThe Hague,\u201d or \u201cinternational law\u201d in your course assignments.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

Also, we\u2019ve taken the liberty of eliminating some courses that are de facto controversial and cannot be taught. That includes \u201cWomen and the Law,\u201d \u201cCritical Race Theory,\u201d \u201cFirst Amendment Law,\u201d and \u201cWater Law\u201d (the governor is big into AI).\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

You\u2019ll probably notice we no longer teach \u201cTransgender Law,\u201d and the dean and professor who authorized that course have been fired.\u00a0Your new dean, as you know, is a former legislator and proud author of the \u201cBathroom Bill.\u201d<\/p>\n

If your course offends someone on the basis that our great United States is not a meritocracy, your course is canceled. Thus, we will no longer be teaching courses in \u201cEmployment Discrimination\u201d or \u201cCivil Rights Law.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

If you teach \u201cFamily Law,\u201d please ensure that all cases involve a traditional nuclear family.\u00a0<\/p>\n

For your interdisciplinary \u201cHistory and the Law\u201d course, avoid mention that Nazi Germany brutally vilified and tortured the LGBTQ+ community<\/a> in ways similar to the United States southern states today.\u00a0Avoid mention that Nazi Germany targeted communists.\u00a0Do not mention that anti-fascists fought fascism.\u00a0Our state legislators have a hard time understanding the difference between antifa, communism, and fascism, as the high school history courses in this state were destroyed 30 years ago.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

If you teach \u201cBankruptcy Law\u201d or \u201cTax Law,\u201d avoid commentary related to the impact of tariffs on the economy.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

Controversial Words:\u00a0<\/strong>To avoid misunderstanding and triggering of unfortunate termination proceedings, please avoid the words \u201ctrans,\u201d \u201ctransatlantic,\u201d \u201ctransoceanic,\u201d \u201ctransportation,\u201d and \u201cTransylvania.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

Controversial Club Sponsorship:\u00a0<\/strong>Please avoid sponsoring controversial clubs. Such club names include \u201cLGBTQ+ Outlaw Club,\u201d \u201cCritical Race Theory Study Group,\u201d or \u201cRights for Everyone Club.\u201d Sponsorship of the \u201cTPUSA Chapter\u201d and \u201cCharlie Kirk Worship Club\u201d is strongly encouraged.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

Accuracy of Materials:\u00a0<\/strong>Please ensure your choices of materials is accurate but balanced. For example, if you teach a \u201cHealth Law\u201d course, please balance your assignment of peer-reviewed resources that demonstrate that vaccines do not cause autism with at least one non-peer-reviewed resource, preferably ones endorsed by RFK Jr.\u00a0Under no circumstances are you to quote Charlie Kirk, as we are unsure as to the accuracy of any of his quotes.<\/p>\n

Clinics:\u00a0<\/strong>The Immigration Law clinic will be repurposed to require mandatory service in ICE to get a better understanding of how immigration works on the ground and not in the ivory tower of academia. Being improperly arrested by ICE will not count toward service hours.<\/p>\n

Faculty Bios and CVs:\u00a0<\/strong>Please ensure that your bios and CVs do not have any reference to preferred pronouns, any work you have done for LGBTQ+ causes, or any \u201cleft leaning\u201d causes such as the Federalist Society.\u00a0We also encourage, but do not require, donations to a right-wing conservative candidate of over $200 or more to demonstrate faculty intellectual diversity.<\/p>\n

DEI: <\/strong>Thanks to a generous grant from the Koch Foundation, we have established a \u201cDrug Enforcement and ICE\u201d (DEI) program that examines the positive ways ICE interacts with our communities.\u00a0All DEI links will now automatically repost there.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

Thank you all for your attention to this matter!<\/p>\n

Administration<\/p>\n

\n

LawProfBlawg<\/em><\/strong><\/a>\u00a0is an anonymous\u00a0law\u00a0professor. Follow him on\u00a0X\/Twitter\/whatever\u00a0(<\/em><\/strong>@lawprofblawg<\/em><\/strong><\/a>). He\u2019s also on BlueSky, Mastodon, and Threads depending on his mood.\u00a0Email him at\u00a0<\/em><\/strong>[email\u00a0protected]<\/em><\/strong><\/a>.\u00a0 The views of this blog post do not represent the views of his employer, his employer\u2019s government, his Dean, his colleagues, his family, or himself.\u00a0 This piece is satire, hopefully.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Dear Colleagues, We at University Administration are now prepared to issue our Academic Freedom guidelines for your classes.\u00a0As you know from last year\u2019s memo, we in administration are strong advocates of free speech on campus.\u00a0With some guidance from us, we believe you will feel more empowered to speak your mind, with proper limits.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 While the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":135120,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[16],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-135119","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-above_the_law"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/xira.com\/p\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/10\/iStock-540983048-scaled-e1716389245339-dP2EcC.jpg?fit=2560%2C1464&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/135119","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=135119"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/135119\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/135120"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=135119"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=135119"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=135119"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}