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Table of contents<\/h2>\n\n- Five Simple Tips to Survive Your Annual Office Holiday Party<\/a><\/li>\n
- 1. You Have to Go to Your Office Holiday Party<\/a><\/li>\n
- 2. How to Walk Into Your Office Holiday Party<\/a>\n
\n- How to Walk Into a Room as the Conquering Hero<\/a><\/li>\n
- Pro Tip:<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n
- 3. How to Approach a Small Group of Co-workers and Not Explode<\/a>\n
\n- Pro Tip:<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n
- 4. Drink Responsibly at Your Office Holiday Party<\/a>\n
\n- Pro Tip:<\/a><\/li>\n
- Pro Tip 2:<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n
- 5. To Get a Wingman, Be a Wingman<\/a>\n
\n- Pro Tip:<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n
- Even More Pro Party-Going Tips<\/a>\n
\n- How to Shake Hands in Two Easy Steps<\/a><\/li>\n
- Toasts: What to Say When You Have Something to Say<\/a><\/li>\n
- Four Pre-Holiday Networking Tips for Introverts<\/a><\/li>\n
- Dining Table Faux Pas<\/a><\/li>\n
- Five Mistakes When Dressing for the Firm Holiday Party<\/a><\/li>\n
- How to Remember Names (Really)<\/a><\/li>\n
- Law Firm\u2019s Guide to a Low-Risk Holiday Party<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/div>\n
The office holiday party is here, and you, an introverted Gen-Z\u00a0remote worker\u00a0<\/a>who lives in Teams and gamed your video background for eight months, now have to put on pants and walk into a rented event space half a block from the office, drink something with cinnamon and prosecco, and deal with Steve who has mistletoe duct taped to his forehead.<\/p>\nThis is your office holiday party, the annual Christmas bash, your corporate \u201cseasonal event.\u201d And we\u2019re going to hold your hand the whole time.<\/p>\n
1. You Have to Go to Your Office Holiday Party<\/h2>\n
Seriously, you can\u2019t wimp out or call off sick. (Unless you really are sick, then, of course, you have to stay home because you\u2019re a decent human being, not an insane sack of virulent germs that will make everyone else sick and ruin their vacation.) Even if attendance isn\u2019t mandatory, you have to go for the stupidest reason: Your senior partner planned it and she\u2019s anxious about pulling it off. She\u2019s invested in the one true metric of success \u2014 attendance. When you show up and put yourself out there, you\u2019re making her look good. Which, of course, is not your job, and I\u2019m not suggesting you can leverage that in any way. This isn\u2019t \u201cSuits,\u201d Marsha. I\u2019m saying that if your boss is proud of her office holiday party, then she\u2019ll be in a good mood for at least a couple of weeks, which is good for everybody.<\/p>\n
Also, you have to go because people need to know you\u2019re real. I know that sounds weird. Of course, you\u2019re real. AI isn\u2019t that<\/em> good. Yet.<\/p>\nWhat I mean is that a lot of these people know you as a tiny face in a tiny box on the bottom left of their tiny screen. In a lot of ways, you aren\u2019t real to them \u2014 just as they aren\u2019t entirely real to you. Showing up IRL lets people shake your hand and slap you on the back. Virtual camaraderie is fine, but building true rapport requires a little skin-on-skin. Which you can only do if you\u2019re in the room. On that note \u2026.<\/p>\n
2. How to Walk Into Your Office Holiday Party<\/h2>\n
This is maybe the most worrisome fear of mingling. Worse than small talk, worse than forgetting someone\u2019s name<\/a>. For you, the walking-inner, entering the room is a huge deal. The mind recognizes how big a deal this is, so it tries its best to support the idea by making you think (worry, agonize) that it\u2019s a big deal for everyone else in the room too. You\u2019ve probably entertained one or two recurring nightmare fantasies where you watch a mental movie of yourself Frank Sinatra-ing into a crowded office party. The record scratches, the conversation stops, and all eyes turn to judge you and the scarf you overthought. Paralysis! Full shutdown! You the deer. Them the headlights.<\/p>\nIn that moment, in the spotlight, what do you even do?<\/em><\/p>\nRelax. Nobody, and I mean nobody, even knows you\u2019re there. Every single individual in attendance is locked into whatever forced conversation they\u2019ve just managed to wedge \u201ccan we circle back \u2026\u201d into. <\/p>\n
However, walking into a room is still a thing \u2014 for you. You have to actually do it. You have to pull that big door open, you have to figure out where to put your coat and you have to locate the bar. These are office Christmas party imperatives, but preceding them is the simplest of actions: Just walk in.<\/p>\n
How to Walk Into a Room as the Conquering Hero<\/h3>\n\n- Just walk in. <\/strong>There\u2019s no ritual here, no tip, no hack. Just walk in.<\/li>\n
- Surveil.<\/strong> Walk into the room for a reasonable distance then stop and take stock. Surveil. Recon. Quickly map the following landmarks:\n
\n- Where are people putting coats and bags?<\/li>\n
- Where is your boss?<\/li>\n
- Where is the one person you know you can start an easy conversation with?<\/li>\n
- Where is the bar?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n
- Do these things:<\/strong>\n
\n- Drop your coat.<\/li>\n
- Shake your boss\u2019s hand and tell her the party\u2019s a raging success.<\/li>\n
- Smack Gene on the back and say something like, \u201cWorking hard or hardly working?\u201d or whatever insipid phrase works for you.<\/li>\n
- Say: \u201cWhat are you drinking, you old scoundrel?\u201d Then go to the bar and top him up; get yourself whatever poison you prefer, even if that poison is perfectly healthy and made mostly from carrot juice and contains not one smidgen of booze.<\/li>\n
- Drop into the conversation and relax.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n
- Next steps:<\/strong> There are no next steps. It\u2019s a party, and strategy is not a requisite. Relax, make bad jokes and enjoy yourself.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
Pro Tip:<\/mark><\/mark><\/h3>\nAdopt absolute old-school swagger. Walk in, sweep off your coat and say to no one in particular, \u201cIs this a work party, or did somebody die!?\u201d<\/p>\n
3. How to Approach a Small Group of Co-workers and Not Explode<\/h2>\n
Let\u2019s say Gene isn\u2019t there and you walk into a party where you don\u2019t know anyone in real life. Everyone there is distributed evenly around the room in little conversation knots. How, in the name of Dale Carnegie, do you wedge yourself into one of those conversations?<\/p>\n
There is an established science for\u00a0approaching a group<\/a>. But let me reassure you: People in that group are fine with you adding yourself. This is an office holiday party \u2014 nobody owns the space. If you want, just step right into the gap between Gary from accounting and Rhonda from ops.<\/p>\nHowever, there is some etiquette involved.<\/p>\n
\n- Read the nonverbal clues.\n
\n- If they are in a tightly sealed circle, all hunched over and whispering, pick another group. They\u2019ve circled the wagons and you\u2019re not getting in.<\/li>\n
- If they are in a loose clench, not talking, and everybody\u2019s looking in different directions like some bad band photo, they\u2019re not really a group. Step up.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n
- Say \u201cExcuse me,\u201d very quietly, or something like, \u201cI\u2019m just gonna slip in here,\u201d or \u201cIS THIS SPOT TAKEN, WAYNE? IS IT?\u201d<\/li>\n
- Then don\u2019t say anything. You don\u2019t know where the conversation is. Is someone talking? Did someone just say something important? Did Rhonda risk telling a really stupid joke, and no one\u2019s laughing? No matter what the conversation is when you walk up, you\u2019re not part of it. Be cool and take the measure of the group. Wait until you know for sure what they\u2019re talking about before you chime in.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
Pro Tip:<\/mark><\/mark><\/h3>\nHere\u2019s a boomer trick. Sometimes, a loosely defined group standing in awkward silence needs a catalyst. Be that seed crystal, Barb. Get in there and launch into your pet theory about why \u201cThe Mandalorian\u201d is the best comedy on television. That group will come together around you because you broke the bubble of awkwardness. You\u2019re the frikkin\u2019 hero here, Barb. Revel in your time.<\/p>\n
4. Drink Responsibly at Your Office Holiday Party<\/h2>\n
It\u2019s an office party. We all know this is a time outside of time \u2014 a place outside of space. What happens at the office holiday party stays in Vegas.<\/p>\n
Except, no, it doesn\u2019t. <\/p>\n
Do you know why you know about Stan from Real Estate tearing off his shirt and yelling, \u201cI\u2019m the captain now!\u201d at last year\u2019s party? Because he did and everyone still talks about it. There are pictures. Also, Stan\u2019s just not used to drinking and overdid it, which could happen to anyone. It\u2019s a damn shame there are pictures. But who are we to judge?<\/p>\n
Your office culture dictates the better wisdom here. Maybe your firm is a three-martini lunch<\/a> firm. Maybe your firm is dedicated to sobriety. The prudent path is one of moderation. Yes, it\u2019s a holiday bash, and the boss put together a banger of a free bar, but proceed with caution. Despite HR\u2019s event-management encouragement to \u201crelax and enjoy yourself\u201d at the holiday party, you are still at work<\/strong>. Drink or don\u2019t drink. What matters is that you don\u2019t end up replacing Stan as the story of the year.<\/p>\nPro Tip:<\/mark><\/mark><\/h3>\nHere\u2019s another boomer trick. Order a Coke with a lime (or Diet Pepsi if you must). It looks like a Cuba Libre, so your boss sees you having a drink (yes, it matters to her), but you\u2019re not. <\/p>\n
Pro Tip 2:<\/mark><\/mark><\/h3>\nAnd here\u2019s a Gen-Z tip: Stop worrying about it. You don\u2019t have to drink to have a good time. You don\u2019t have to booze-signal to avoid judgment. You do you.<\/p>\n
5. To Get a Wingman, Be a Wingman<\/h2>\n
Use the buddy system to overcome solo party awkwardness. If you have a solid work friend, team up to watch each other\u2019s backs. Share wingman duties according to the situation. Is your buddy slipping into a discussion about politics? Divert the whole thing with a joke, then bring up a new topic. Are you stuck in an interminable conversation with Steve about parking restrictions? Signal your wingman. She\u2019ll swoop in, grab you by the elbow, look at Steve, and say, \u2018Can I borrow him for a minute?\u2019 It\u2019s a game-changer.<\/p>\n
If you don\u2019t have a wingman, then be a wingman. See the new guy hovering by herself near the copy machine\/bar? Notice how worried she looks? That\u2019s because she\u2019s wondering how she\u2019s going to survive a party where she doesn\u2019t know the culture or the people. You, madam, can be her savior. Just walk right up to her, introduce yourself, and say something like, \u201cI\u2019m not gonna make it through this ridiculous shindig alone \u2014 want to buddy up?\u201d<\/p>\n
For the rest of her life, she will remember that moment and your graceful and generous act of selfless bravery. (OK, not selfless because you\u2019re getting a buddy out of it, but still.) Imagine if someone had done that for you so many years ago when you stiff-walked awkwardly toward the copy machine\/bar? Step up. Be the hero.<\/p>\n
Pro Tip:<\/mark><\/mark><\/h3>\nThat was the pro tip.<\/p>\n
Even More Pro Party-Going Tips<\/h2>\nHow to Shake Hands in Two Easy Steps<\/a> <\/h3>\nSolid advice that covers all the worst handshakes and how to deal with them.<\/p>\n
- \n
- How to Walk Into a Room as the Conquering Hero<\/a><\/li>\n
- Pro Tip:<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n
- 3. How to Approach a Small Group of Co-workers and Not Explode<\/a>\n
- \n
- Pro Tip:<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n
- 4. Drink Responsibly at Your Office Holiday Party<\/a>\n
- \n
- Pro Tip:<\/a><\/li>\n
- Pro Tip 2:<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n
- 5. To Get a Wingman, Be a Wingman<\/a>\n
- \n
- Pro Tip:<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n
- Even More Pro Party-Going Tips<\/a>\n
- \n
- How to Shake Hands in Two Easy Steps<\/a><\/li>\n
- Toasts: What to Say When You Have Something to Say<\/a><\/li>\n
- Four Pre-Holiday Networking Tips for Introverts<\/a><\/li>\n
- Dining Table Faux Pas<\/a><\/li>\n
- Five Mistakes When Dressing for the Firm Holiday Party<\/a><\/li>\n
- How to Remember Names (Really)<\/a><\/li>\n
- Law Firm\u2019s Guide to a Low-Risk Holiday Party<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/div>\n
The office holiday party is here, and you, an introverted Gen-Z\u00a0remote worker\u00a0<\/a>who lives in Teams and gamed your video background for eight months, now have to put on pants and walk into a rented event space half a block from the office, drink something with cinnamon and prosecco, and deal with Steve who has mistletoe duct taped to his forehead.<\/p>\n
This is your office holiday party, the annual Christmas bash, your corporate \u201cseasonal event.\u201d And we\u2019re going to hold your hand the whole time.<\/p>\n
1. You Have to Go to Your Office Holiday Party<\/h2>\n
Seriously, you can\u2019t wimp out or call off sick. (Unless you really are sick, then, of course, you have to stay home because you\u2019re a decent human being, not an insane sack of virulent germs that will make everyone else sick and ruin their vacation.) Even if attendance isn\u2019t mandatory, you have to go for the stupidest reason: Your senior partner planned it and she\u2019s anxious about pulling it off. She\u2019s invested in the one true metric of success \u2014 attendance. When you show up and put yourself out there, you\u2019re making her look good. Which, of course, is not your job, and I\u2019m not suggesting you can leverage that in any way. This isn\u2019t \u201cSuits,\u201d Marsha. I\u2019m saying that if your boss is proud of her office holiday party, then she\u2019ll be in a good mood for at least a couple of weeks, which is good for everybody.<\/p>\n
Also, you have to go because people need to know you\u2019re real. I know that sounds weird. Of course, you\u2019re real. AI isn\u2019t that<\/em> good. Yet.<\/p>\n
What I mean is that a lot of these people know you as a tiny face in a tiny box on the bottom left of their tiny screen. In a lot of ways, you aren\u2019t real to them \u2014 just as they aren\u2019t entirely real to you. Showing up IRL lets people shake your hand and slap you on the back. Virtual camaraderie is fine, but building true rapport requires a little skin-on-skin. Which you can only do if you\u2019re in the room. On that note \u2026.<\/p>\n
2. How to Walk Into Your Office Holiday Party<\/h2>\n
This is maybe the most worrisome fear of mingling. Worse than small talk, worse than forgetting someone\u2019s name<\/a>. For you, the walking-inner, entering the room is a huge deal. The mind recognizes how big a deal this is, so it tries its best to support the idea by making you think (worry, agonize) that it\u2019s a big deal for everyone else in the room too. You\u2019ve probably entertained one or two recurring nightmare fantasies where you watch a mental movie of yourself Frank Sinatra-ing into a crowded office party. The record scratches, the conversation stops, and all eyes turn to judge you and the scarf you overthought. Paralysis! Full shutdown! You the deer. Them the headlights.<\/p>\n
In that moment, in the spotlight, what do you even do?<\/em><\/p>\n
Relax. Nobody, and I mean nobody, even knows you\u2019re there. Every single individual in attendance is locked into whatever forced conversation they\u2019ve just managed to wedge \u201ccan we circle back \u2026\u201d into. <\/p>\n
However, walking into a room is still a thing \u2014 for you. You have to actually do it. You have to pull that big door open, you have to figure out where to put your coat and you have to locate the bar. These are office Christmas party imperatives, but preceding them is the simplest of actions: Just walk in.<\/p>\n
How to Walk Into a Room as the Conquering Hero<\/h3>\n
- \n
- Just walk in. <\/strong>There\u2019s no ritual here, no tip, no hack. Just walk in.<\/li>\n
- Surveil.<\/strong> Walk into the room for a reasonable distance then stop and take stock. Surveil. Recon. Quickly map the following landmarks:\n
- \n
- Where are people putting coats and bags?<\/li>\n
- Where is your boss?<\/li>\n
- Where is the one person you know you can start an easy conversation with?<\/li>\n
- Where is the bar?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n
- Do these things:<\/strong>\n
- \n
- Drop your coat.<\/li>\n
- Shake your boss\u2019s hand and tell her the party\u2019s a raging success.<\/li>\n
- Smack Gene on the back and say something like, \u201cWorking hard or hardly working?\u201d or whatever insipid phrase works for you.<\/li>\n
- Say: \u201cWhat are you drinking, you old scoundrel?\u201d Then go to the bar and top him up; get yourself whatever poison you prefer, even if that poison is perfectly healthy and made mostly from carrot juice and contains not one smidgen of booze.<\/li>\n
- Drop into the conversation and relax.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n
- Next steps:<\/strong> There are no next steps. It\u2019s a party, and strategy is not a requisite. Relax, make bad jokes and enjoy yourself.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
Pro Tip:<\/mark><\/mark><\/h3>\n
Adopt absolute old-school swagger. Walk in, sweep off your coat and say to no one in particular, \u201cIs this a work party, or did somebody die!?\u201d<\/p>\n
3. How to Approach a Small Group of Co-workers and Not Explode<\/h2>\n
Let\u2019s say Gene isn\u2019t there and you walk into a party where you don\u2019t know anyone in real life. Everyone there is distributed evenly around the room in little conversation knots. How, in the name of Dale Carnegie, do you wedge yourself into one of those conversations?<\/p>\n
There is an established science for\u00a0approaching a group<\/a>. But let me reassure you: People in that group are fine with you adding yourself. This is an office holiday party \u2014 nobody owns the space. If you want, just step right into the gap between Gary from accounting and Rhonda from ops.<\/p>\n
However, there is some etiquette involved.<\/p>\n
- \n
- Read the nonverbal clues.\n
- \n
- If they are in a tightly sealed circle, all hunched over and whispering, pick another group. They\u2019ve circled the wagons and you\u2019re not getting in.<\/li>\n
- If they are in a loose clench, not talking, and everybody\u2019s looking in different directions like some bad band photo, they\u2019re not really a group. Step up.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n
- Say \u201cExcuse me,\u201d very quietly, or something like, \u201cI\u2019m just gonna slip in here,\u201d or \u201cIS THIS SPOT TAKEN, WAYNE? IS IT?\u201d<\/li>\n
- Then don\u2019t say anything. You don\u2019t know where the conversation is. Is someone talking? Did someone just say something important? Did Rhonda risk telling a really stupid joke, and no one\u2019s laughing? No matter what the conversation is when you walk up, you\u2019re not part of it. Be cool and take the measure of the group. Wait until you know for sure what they\u2019re talking about before you chime in.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
Pro Tip:<\/mark><\/mark><\/h3>\n
Here\u2019s a boomer trick. Sometimes, a loosely defined group standing in awkward silence needs a catalyst. Be that seed crystal, Barb. Get in there and launch into your pet theory about why \u201cThe Mandalorian\u201d is the best comedy on television. That group will come together around you because you broke the bubble of awkwardness. You\u2019re the frikkin\u2019 hero here, Barb. Revel in your time.<\/p>\n
4. Drink Responsibly at Your Office Holiday Party<\/h2>\n
It\u2019s an office party. We all know this is a time outside of time \u2014 a place outside of space. What happens at the office holiday party stays in Vegas.<\/p>\n
Except, no, it doesn\u2019t. <\/p>\n
Do you know why you know about Stan from Real Estate tearing off his shirt and yelling, \u201cI\u2019m the captain now!\u201d at last year\u2019s party? Because he did and everyone still talks about it. There are pictures. Also, Stan\u2019s just not used to drinking and overdid it, which could happen to anyone. It\u2019s a damn shame there are pictures. But who are we to judge?<\/p>\n
Your office culture dictates the better wisdom here. Maybe your firm is a three-martini lunch<\/a> firm. Maybe your firm is dedicated to sobriety. The prudent path is one of moderation. Yes, it\u2019s a holiday bash, and the boss put together a banger of a free bar, but proceed with caution. Despite HR\u2019s event-management encouragement to \u201crelax and enjoy yourself\u201d at the holiday party, you are still at work<\/strong>. Drink or don\u2019t drink. What matters is that you don\u2019t end up replacing Stan as the story of the year.<\/p>\n
Pro Tip:<\/mark><\/mark><\/h3>\n
Here\u2019s another boomer trick. Order a Coke with a lime (or Diet Pepsi if you must). It looks like a Cuba Libre, so your boss sees you having a drink (yes, it matters to her), but you\u2019re not. <\/p>\n
Pro Tip 2:<\/mark><\/mark><\/h3>\n
And here\u2019s a Gen-Z tip: Stop worrying about it. You don\u2019t have to drink to have a good time. You don\u2019t have to booze-signal to avoid judgment. You do you.<\/p>\n
5. To Get a Wingman, Be a Wingman<\/h2>\n
Use the buddy system to overcome solo party awkwardness. If you have a solid work friend, team up to watch each other\u2019s backs. Share wingman duties according to the situation. Is your buddy slipping into a discussion about politics? Divert the whole thing with a joke, then bring up a new topic. Are you stuck in an interminable conversation with Steve about parking restrictions? Signal your wingman. She\u2019ll swoop in, grab you by the elbow, look at Steve, and say, \u2018Can I borrow him for a minute?\u2019 It\u2019s a game-changer.<\/p>\n
If you don\u2019t have a wingman, then be a wingman. See the new guy hovering by herself near the copy machine\/bar? Notice how worried she looks? That\u2019s because she\u2019s wondering how she\u2019s going to survive a party where she doesn\u2019t know the culture or the people. You, madam, can be her savior. Just walk right up to her, introduce yourself, and say something like, \u201cI\u2019m not gonna make it through this ridiculous shindig alone \u2014 want to buddy up?\u201d<\/p>\n
For the rest of her life, she will remember that moment and your graceful and generous act of selfless bravery. (OK, not selfless because you\u2019re getting a buddy out of it, but still.) Imagine if someone had done that for you so many years ago when you stiff-walked awkwardly toward the copy machine\/bar? Step up. Be the hero.<\/p>\n
Pro Tip:<\/mark><\/mark><\/h3>\n
That was the pro tip.<\/p>\n
Even More Pro Party-Going Tips<\/h2>\n
How to Shake Hands in Two Easy Steps<\/a> <\/h3>\n
Solid advice that covers all the worst handshakes and how to deal with them.<\/p>\n
- Read the nonverbal clues.\n
- Surveil.<\/strong> Walk into the room for a reasonable distance then stop and take stock. Surveil. Recon. Quickly map the following landmarks:\n
- Toasts: What to Say When You Have Something to Say<\/a><\/li>\n
- Even More Pro Party-Going Tips<\/a>\n
- Pro Tip 2:<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n
- 4. Drink Responsibly at Your Office Holiday Party<\/a>\n
- Pro Tip:<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n