{"id":158568,"date":"2026-07-28T06:03:59","date_gmt":"2026-07-28T14:03:59","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/2026\/07\/28\/makeout-video-elevates-wachtell-to-the-internets-main-character\/"},"modified":"2026-07-28T06:03:59","modified_gmt":"2026-07-28T14:03:59","slug":"makeout-video-elevates-wachtell-to-the-internets-main-character","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/2026\/07\/28\/makeout-video-elevates-wachtell-to-the-internets-main-character\/","title":{"rendered":"Makeout Video Elevates Wachtell To The Internet\u2019s Main Character"},"content":{"rendered":"

As a firm, Wachtell, Lipton, Rosen & Katz is a lot of things, but Morgan & Morgan it is not. Wachtell has under 300 lawyers and is the law firm you never hear about unless you\u2019re in the legal industry weeds and realize they\u2019re quietly hoovering up cash with per partner profits north of $12 million. They are smaller than many megafirms, and they make up for it by being the hardest of hard core. Wachtell lawyers are so sheltered in their offices churning out work product that a few years ago, the firm had to assign associates<\/em> to research and explain memes to the partners<\/a>. Somewhere there is a time entry that reads \u201c.8, draft memo re: significance of Poop Emoji.\u201d<\/p>\n

Now, thanks to a Central Park bench, everybody on TikTok and Insta know the name \u201cWachtell.\u201d <\/p>\n

By now you have seen the video, or seen the 60 pieces written about the video, which we noted when it was still a blind item<\/a>. We frankly hoped it would remain a blind item, because content creators going around to embarrass people shouldn\u2019t be fed any more attention than absolutely necessary. And they absolutely shouldn\u2019t get any help monetizing ambushing strangers. Alas, everyone else has since un-blinded this story with gusto, up to and including the New York Post<\/em>, which took a break from covering Mayor Mamdani like the Bugle<\/em> covers Spider-Man<\/a> to out the lawyers involved. In any event, a partner and an associate were filmed making out in the park and rather than shrug it off, they pushed back, giving the guy filming the drama he needed to send an otherwise mundane moment to millions of views.<\/p>\n

And, of course, the coverage kept mentioning the pair worked at a place called \u201cWachtell.\u201d<\/p>\n

Coincidentally, the lawyers were both on the Wachtell team that recently beat up Elon Musk, the man who so desperately strives to be the internet\u2019s main character every day. Musk had sued Sam Altman and OpenAI alleging a breach-of-charitable trust case, and after a three-week trial, a jury deliberated for under two hours before telling Musk to pound sand.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s a victory Wachtell would revel if Wachtell had human emotions like that. After Wachtell outsmarted Musk in the Twitter acquisition \u2014 a predictable outcome after Musk personally commandeered deal strategy from his own lawyers<\/a> \u2014 Musk raged against Wachtell\u2019s roughly $90 million success fee<\/a> that Musk inherited when he took over their client. He ultimately sued the firm<\/a> for being better lawyers. Which, likely played into Altman\u2019s decision to call Wachtell<\/a> as soon as Musk filed his suit against the AI company. <\/p>\n

There\u2019s something fitting about the fact that Wachtell and the team that Musk hired have become the internet celebrities. Without even the remotest interest in this notoriety, they\u2019ve secured exposure than Elon has to make his engineers futz with algorithms to achieve<\/a>. They\u2019re not even trying<\/em> and beating him.<\/p>\n

Wachtell is basically the Road Runner \u201cmeep meeping\u201d in new and more creative ways while Elon keeps building giant rockets that blow up. <\/p>\n

Earlier<\/strong>: Biglaw Partner-Associate Public Makeout Sesh Posted On Social Media<\/a>
Wachtell Associates Tasked With Explaining Memes To Partners In Twitter v. Musk Legal Battle<\/a>
Elon Musk Sues Wachtell For Being Better Lawyers<\/a>
World\u2019s Richest Man Complains About Law Firm\u2019s \u2018Greed\u2019<\/a>
Elon Musk Sues OpenAI. They Make Fun Of Him And Hire Wachtell.<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

\"Headshot\"Joe Patrice<\/a>\u00a0is a senior editor at Above the Law and co-host of Thinking Like A Lawyer<\/a>. Feel free to\u00a0email<\/a> any tips, questions, or comments. Follow him on\u00a0Twitter<\/a>\u00a0or Bluesky<\/a> if you\u2019re interested in law, politics, and a healthy dose of college sports news.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

The post Makeout Video Elevates Wachtell To The Internet\u2019s Main Character<\/a> appeared first on Above the Law<\/a>.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/figure>\n

As a firm, Wachtell, Lipton, Rosen & Katz is a lot of things, but Morgan & Morgan it is not. Wachtell has under 300 lawyers and is the law firm you never hear about unless you\u2019re in the legal industry weeds and realize they\u2019re quietly hoovering up cash with per partner profits north of $12 million. They are smaller than many megafirms, and they make up for it by being the hardest of hard core. Wachtell lawyers are so sheltered in their offices churning out work product that a few years ago, the firm had to assign associates<\/em> to research and explain memes to the partners<\/a>. Somewhere there is a time entry that reads \u201c.8, draft memo re: significance of Poop Emoji.\u201d<\/p>\n

Now, thanks to a Central Park bench, everybody on TikTok and Insta know the name \u201cWachtell.\u201d <\/p>\n

By now you have seen the video, or seen the 60 pieces written about the video, which we noted when it was still a blind item<\/a>. We frankly hoped it would remain a blind item, because content creators going around to embarrass people shouldn\u2019t be fed any more attention than absolutely necessary. And they absolutely shouldn\u2019t get any help monetizing ambushing strangers. Alas, everyone else has since un-blinded this story with gusto, up to and including the New York Post<\/em>, which took a break from covering Mayor Mamdani like the Bugle<\/em> covers Spider-Man<\/a> to out the lawyers involved. In any event, a partner and an associate were filmed making out in the park and rather than shrug it off, they pushed back, giving the guy filming the drama he needed to send an otherwise mundane moment to millions of views.<\/p>\n

And, of course, the coverage kept mentioning the pair worked at a place called \u201cWachtell.\u201d<\/p>\n

Coincidentally, the lawyers were both on the Wachtell team that recently beat up Elon Musk, the man who so desperately strives to be the internet\u2019s main character every day. Musk had sued Sam Altman and OpenAI alleging a breach-of-charitable trust case, and after a three-week trial, a jury deliberated for under two hours before telling Musk to pound sand.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s a victory Wachtell would revel if Wachtell had human emotions like that. After Wachtell outsmarted Musk in the Twitter acquisition \u2014 a predictable outcome after Musk personally commandeered deal strategy from his own lawyers<\/a> \u2014 Musk raged against Wachtell\u2019s roughly $90 million success fee<\/a> that Musk inherited when he took over their client. He ultimately sued the firm<\/a> for being better lawyers. Which, likely played into Altman\u2019s decision to call Wachtell<\/a> as soon as Musk filed his suit against the AI company. <\/p>\n

There\u2019s something fitting about the fact that Wachtell and the team that Musk hired have become the internet celebrities. Without even the remotest interest in this notoriety, they\u2019ve secured exposure than Elon has to make his engineers futz with algorithms to achieve<\/a>. They\u2019re not even trying<\/em> and beating him.<\/p>\n

Wachtell is basically the Road Runner \u201cmeep meeping\u201d in new and more creative ways while Elon keeps building giant rockets that blow up. <\/p>\n

Earlier<\/strong>: Biglaw Partner-Associate Public Makeout Sesh Posted On Social Media<\/a>
Wachtell Associates Tasked With Explaining Memes To Partners In Twitter v. Musk Legal Battle<\/a>
Elon Musk Sues Wachtell For Being Better Lawyers<\/a>
World\u2019s Richest Man Complains About Law Firm\u2019s \u2018Greed\u2019<\/a>
Elon Musk Sues OpenAI. They Make Fun Of Him And Hire Wachtell.<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

\"Headshot\"Joe Patrice<\/a>\u00a0is a senior editor at Above the Law and co-host of Thinking Like A Lawyer<\/a>. Feel free to\u00a0email<\/a> any tips, questions, or comments. Follow him on\u00a0Twitter<\/a>\u00a0or Bluesky<\/a> if you\u2019re interested in law, politics, and a healthy dose of college sports news.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

As a firm, Wachtell, Lipton, Rosen & Katz is a lot of things, but Morgan & Morgan it is not. Wachtell has under 300 lawyers and is the law firm you never hear about unless you\u2019re in the legal industry weeds and realize they\u2019re quietly hoovering up cash with per partner profits north of $12 […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":158460,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[16],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-158568","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-above_the_law"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/xira.com\/p\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/07\/Headshot-300x200-5Oy02o.jpg?fit=300%2C200&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/158568","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=158568"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/158568\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/158460"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=158568"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=158568"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xira.com\/p\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=158568"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}