endure quite so much stress<\/a>?<\/p>\nWhat if the goal is sustainability instead of resilience? Here are five ways to think differently about resilience.<\/p>\n
1. Stop Measuring Your Success by How Much You Can Handle<\/h2>\n
Most of us are good at handling it all. \u201cCan I handle this?\u201d \u201cWhy, yes, I can.\u201d We handle the difficult client. We handle the late-night email. We handle the additional matter. We handle the emergency that somehow became our emergency. We handle the week that was supposed to be manageable but wasn\u2019t.<\/p>\n
The problem is that our ability to handle something isn\u2019t the same as whether our life is healthy or sustainable. We tend to measure our professional success by what we accomplish, not by what it costs us to accomplish it. If the work gets done, the deadline is met, and the client is satisfied, then the day was a success. We are a success, whether we have anything left in the tank or not.<\/p>\n
But our capacity is not limitless.<\/h3>\n
We have cognitive capacity, emotional capacity, physical capacity, and even capacity for uncertainty. And those reserves can be depleted. Sleep, stress, workload, relationships, health, and what else is happening in our lives all affect how much capacity we have available on a given day to handle our professional responsibilities. The more we handle, the more we may not<\/em> be able to handle. And that\u2019s normal.<\/p>\nSo instead of always asking, \u201cCan I handle this?\u201d try asking, \u201cWhat is handling this going to cost me?\u201d If the answer points to an unsustainable or unhealthy outcome, focus on setting boundaries, delegating, and other ways the task can be accomplished with less strain on your capacity.<\/p>\n
2. Build Recovery into Your Work, Not Just After It\u2019s Complete<\/h2>\n
We often think about recovery as something that happens after the stressful thing is over. We\u2019ll get some rest after the trial. We\u2019ll take a vacation after the transaction closes. We\u2019ll catch up on sleep after the big deadline.<\/p>\n
The problem is that lawyers often don\u2019t get much of an \u201cafter.\u201d One demanding matter runs into another. One deadline is followed by another. And sometimes the next crisis arrives before we\u2019ve finished processing the last one (or even finished handling<\/em> the last one). Thankfully, recovery doesn\u2019t require a week at the beach or even a long weekend of sleeping. It can happen in much smaller increments.<\/p>\nEven short breaks serve an important purpose.<\/h3>\n
A quiet transition after a difficult meeting. Ten minutes without email between challenging tasks. A lunch that isn\u2019t spent answering messages. A period of time without your phone. These things may sound insignificant compared to a vacation, but they interrupt the pattern of continuous activation and help lower stress. Plus, they are much more accessible and possible.<\/p>\n
We don\u2019t need to eliminate periods of intense work. Law will always have busy seasons and demanding matters. But if every period of intense effort is immediately followed by another one, we eventually stop recovering at all. Lack of recovery is not the same as lack of resilience. Allowing ourselves to recover improves resilience.<\/p>\n
To make sure you have time to recover, build in a 15-minute habit that works for you throughout your day: a stretch break, a walk around the block, singing in the car on your commute home, or sleeping late one morning a week. Anything that makes you feel refreshed.<\/p>\n
There is an unhelpful assumption built into some wellness advice that lawyers often receive: If you are sufficiently resilient, you should be able to function well regardless of your environment. That\u2019s not true.<\/p>\n
Imagine two lawyers with the same skills and personalities. One works in an environment with reasonable expectations, supportive colleagues, some control over their schedule, and a supervisor who understands that everything cannot be urgent. The other works in an environment where everything is urgent, staffing is inadequate, boundaries are nonexistent, and being constantly available is considered part of being a good lawyer. We shouldn\u2019t be surprised if those two lawyers have very different experiences of stress.<\/p>\n
Of course, we can\u2019t always choose or change our work environment, and even when we do, we still can\u2019t completely control it. But that doesn\u2019t mean the environment is irrelevant to our stress levels.<\/p>\n
Workload, autonomy, staffing, management, psychological safety, response expectations, and the ability to disconnect all affect our capacity to stay well. They are conditions that influence whether people can do demanding work sustainably \u2013 in other words, for the long haul. While a resilient person may be able to function in a difficult environment, that doesn\u2019t mean a difficult environment is irrelevant to your resilience.<\/p>\n
If you can change your work environment in any positive way, try it.<\/h3>\n
That doesn\u2019t necessarily mean leaving your work, getting a new job, quitting the practice of law, or making other really big decisions. It could mean any of those, but it could also mean committing to not work with a particular colleague, setting boundaries on your time, or delegating more. Little changes can make a big difference in our working environment and our ability to sustain our work.<\/p>\n
We are used to measuring performance. Did we meet the deadline? Did we win the case? Did we catch the issue? Did we satisfy the client? Did we produce good work? Did we settle the matter? All good questions, but we often forget another important question: How long did it take to recover?<\/p>\n
Think about the last particularly difficult week you had. How long did it take before you felt like yourself again? Was it Friday night? Sunday afternoon? Monday morning? Or did you spend the entire weekend exhausted, irritable, distracted, or simply trying to recover enough energy to start again? Do you always dread Monday?<\/p>\n
If we routinely need the entire weekend to recover from the work week, if a difficult meeting leaves us physically tense for the rest of the day, if we finish a major project and immediately feel relief rather than satisfaction, all of that tells us something. We might think it tells us that we aren\u2019t resilient. Not true. Maybe it simply means we need recovery time built into our work.<\/p>\n
You may be incredibly resilient, but without time for recovery, you won\u2019t feel like it. Start measuring the time it takes to really recover from different stressors, and then develop a plan to work into your regular workday snippets of recovery time or take longer recovery breaks when needed, when you can.<\/p>\n
5. Redefine Resilience as Knowing When Not<\/em> to Push Through<\/h2>\nPerhaps the biggest problem with the way we talk about resilience is that we have made \u201ckeep going\u201d its unofficial definition. But sometimes the resilient thing is not<\/em> to push through. Rather than \u201csucking it up,\u201d the better, more resilient \u2013 and sustainable \u2013 choice might be:<\/p>\n\n- Asking for help<\/li>\n
- Renegotiating a deadline<\/li>\n
- Delegating a task<\/li>\n
- Taking a real break instead of squeezing in another task<\/li>\n
- Changing how we approach our workload<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n
And sometimes, if the circumstances allow it, it may mean deciding that a particular job, role, or environment isn\u2019t sustainable.<\/p>\n
There is an important difference between giving up because something is difficult and making an intelligent adjustment because the current approach isn\u2019t working. We don\u2019t consider a lawyer less competent because they recognize that a legal strategy isn\u2019t working and change course. We shouldn\u2019t apply a different standard to our own careers and lives.<\/p>\n
Maybe the most resilient response isn\u2019t always, \u201cI can handle it.\u201d Sometimes it is, \u201cI can<\/em> handle this, but I choose not<\/em> to handle it this way.\u201d<\/p>\nReality vs. The Myth of Resilience: Why True Grit Still Has Its Place<\/h2>\n
We need the ability to navigate difficult situations, recover from setbacks, and keep moving when things don\u2019t go according to plan. But resilience shouldn\u2019t mean becoming so good at absorbing stress that we stop noticing what the stress is costing us. A better goal is sustainability.<\/p>\n
\nListen to Jamie Spannhake\u2019s latest column:<\/h3>\n
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