It is May the 4th, which means that every social media intern is straining to make a half-relevant Star Wars reference. Sadly, the Department of Justice has joined this trend, with an entry that encapsulates the once-venerable institution’s precipitous fall from grace since — for lack of a better phrase — “somehow, Trump returned.” Exhibiting all the artistic craftsmanship of the Holiday Special, the official U.S. Attorneys account just belched out a yellow-text crawl begging for new recruits to stanch the talent deficit caused after the DOJ lost over a quarter of its lawyers.
This is, amazingly, worse than you can possibly imagine:
It is, by far, not the most important thing happening here, but that’s the logo font not the crawl font. Which, for the record, is News Gothic. Whoever made this could not be bothered to JUST GOOGLE “Star Wars opening crawl” to see what it looks like before posting on behalf of the federal government’s prosecutorial arm. They put so little effort into this post you’d think they were trying to send it to an El Salvadoran slave camp. The production quality is recruiting like a UHF channel ad hawking the local Ewok furry convention. If you can’t watch the video, the crawl reads:
The USAO Is Hiring.
Will You Answer The Call To Justice?
In The Pursuit of the Law, There Is No Try — Only Do.
Do Great Things.
Apply Today.
A Jar Jar Binks-themed burlesque show would not offend the basic premise of Star Wars any worse than this tweet. Assuming the most benign administration — which this is not — prosecutors are the Empire! They are the big bureaucratic institution designed to punish people. In this administration, where the DOJ lies to courts, persecutes refugees, filing criminal charges against civil rights workers, and building a massive, unnecessary palace for its emperor, this agency LARPs as the Empire at its most cartoonishly evil.
But most of all, this post is just sad.
The legal profession is, admittedly, too stuffy. But the Department of Justice is not the corner of the profession that needs to loosen up. Prosecutors are charged with the most awesome and potentially destructive power available to a lawyer. The people filling these positions have the power to bring the fully armed and operational force of the federal government to bear on an individual, with that person’s life and liberty on the line. It’s the same problem as judges putting punchlines in their opinions — it’s all well and good when corporations quibble over contracts, but it’s grotestque to work on your tight five while exiling a human being to prison. Prosecutors should respect the gravity of the position.
In February, former Trump DOJ Chief of Staff Chad Mizelle posted a tweet asking prospective AUSAs to slide into his DMs. But that was the Last Jedi to this Rise of Skywalker — this is a whole new low befitting an institution that just brought a criminal case over seashells.
Who greenlit this script? “In the pursuit of the law”? But you don’t pursue the law, you practice law. You pursue justice. (Well, this DOJ doesn’t, but in theory.) And I get that they’re aiming for Yoda — “Do or do not, there is no try” — but the line “There Is No Try — Only Do” lands closer to Charlie from It’s Always Sunny. Then again, this DOJ writes briefs like an illiterate concussion patient, so maybe this is their target recruitment audience. If an insurance lawyer and a parking garage lawyer can pretend to be U.S. Attorneys, then maybe it’s time for an expert in Bird Law.
Joe Patrice is a senior editor at Above the Law and co-host of Thinking Like A Lawyer. Feel free to email any tips, questions, or comments. Follow him on Twitter or Bluesky if you’re interested in law, politics, and a healthy dose of college sports news. Joe also serves as a Managing Director at RPN Executive Search.
The post DOJ Posts Star Wars-Themed Tweet Seeking Recruits Who Misunderstand The Whole Point Of Star Wars appeared first on Above the Law.
It is May the 4th, which means that every social media intern is straining to make a half-relevant Star Wars reference. Sadly, the Department of Justice has joined this trend, with an entry that encapsulates the once-venerable institution’s precipitous fall from grace since — for lack of a better phrase — “somehow, Trump returned.” Exhibiting all the artistic craftsmanship of the Holiday Special, the official U.S. Attorneys account just belched out a yellow-text crawl begging for new recruits to stanch the talent deficit caused after the DOJ lost over a quarter of its lawyers.
This is, amazingly, worse than you can possibly imagine:
It is, by far, not the most important thing happening here, but that’s the logo font not the crawl font. Which, for the record, is News Gothic. Whoever made this could not be bothered to JUST GOOGLE “Star Wars opening crawl” to see what it looks like before posting on behalf of the federal government’s prosecutorial arm. They put so little effort into this post you’d think they were trying to send it to an El Salvadoran slave camp. The production quality is recruiting like a UHF channel ad hawking the local Ewok furry convention. If you can’t watch the video, the crawl reads:
The USAO Is Hiring.
Will You Answer The Call To Justice?
In The Pursuit of the Law, There Is No Try — Only Do.
Do Great Things.
Apply Today.
A Jar Jar Binks-themed burlesque show would not offend the basic premise of Star Wars any worse than this tweet. Assuming the most benign administration — which this is not — prosecutors are the Empire! They are the big bureaucratic institution designed to punish people. In this administration, where the DOJ lies to courts, persecutes refugees, filing criminal charges against civil rights workers, and building a massive, unnecessary palace for its emperor, this agency LARPs as the Empire at its most cartoonishly evil.
But most of all, this post is just sad.
The legal profession is, admittedly, too stuffy. But the Department of Justice is not the corner of the profession that needs to loosen up. Prosecutors are charged with the most awesome and potentially destructive power available to a lawyer. The people filling these positions have the power to bring the fully armed and operational force of the federal government to bear on an individual, with that person’s life and liberty on the line. It’s the same problem as judges putting punchlines in their opinions — it’s all well and good when corporations quibble over contracts, but it’s grotestque to work on your tight five while exiling a human being to prison. Prosecutors should respect the gravity of the position.
In February, former Trump DOJ Chief of Staff Chad Mizelle posted a tweet asking prospective AUSAs to slide into his DMs. But that was the Last Jedi to this Rise of Skywalker — this is a whole new low befitting an institution that just brought a criminal case over seashells.
Who greenlit this script? “In the pursuit of the law”? But you don’t pursue the law, you practice law. You pursue justice. (Well, this DOJ doesn’t, but in theory.) And I get that they’re aiming for Yoda — “Do or do not, there is no try” — but the line “There Is No Try — Only Do” lands closer to Charlie from It’s Always Sunny. Then again, this DOJ writes briefs like an illiterate concussion patient, so maybe this is their target recruitment audience. If an insurance lawyer and a parking garage lawyer can pretend to be U.S. Attorneys, then maybe it’s time for an expert in Bird Law.
Joe Patrice is a senior editor at Above the Law and co-host of Thinking Like A Lawyer. Feel free to email any tips, questions, or comments. Follow him on Twitter or Bluesky if you’re interested in law, politics, and a healthy dose of college sports news. Joe also serves as a Managing Director at RPN Executive Search.
