Who says lawyers have to sacrifice their creative side! While many attorneys find the daily grind of practicing law keeps them from their artistic passions, there are still avenues to keep legal eagles from letting that part of their brain atrophy one billable hour at a time. For example, consider joining the Department of Justice!
Yes, according to a report from the New York Times, lawyers in at least six U.S. Attorney’s Offices just received a memo from a senior DOJ official inviting them to flex those creative muscles and figure out how the administration can put George Soros in jail. Is there any reason to put Soros in jail? Not that anyone can tell! But Donald Trump has identified Soros as a political enemy, and in peak proto-Pinochet form, Trump wants his DOJ to put the aging philanthropist in jail.
Come with me and you’ll be
In a world of pure imagination
That comparison may seem like “Trump Derangement Syndrome,” a sort of wild hyperbole that takes Trump’s words out of context to assume the worst. Let’s check the exact quote before leaping to conclusions:
In reply to a question from NBC News about Soros, the president said that he “should be put in jail.”
Cryptic! The man truly is an enigma wrapped in a riddle wrapped in bronzer. He also suggested this could be a RICO case because he’s both not a lawyer and incredibly dumb.
In any event, federal prosecutors are now tasked with inventing charges to make the boss happy. He already posted-then-deleted a message excoriating Attorney General Bondi for not prosecuting his political enemies, so it’s time to get busy over there! Even if there’s no conceivable or, frankly, professionally ethical justification.
The official’s directive, a copy of which was viewed by The New York Times, goes as far as to list possible charges prosecutors could file, ranging from arson to material support of terrorism. The memo suggests department leaders are following orders from the president that specific people or groups be subject to criminal investigation — a major break from decades of past practice meant to insulate the Justice Department from political interference.
This is the practical extension of the White House decision to declare Antifa a domestic terrorism organization, allowing him to broadly accuse anyone left of Steve Bannon a terrorist member of the non-existent organization. And, critically, to accuse anyone giving money to any anti-authoritarian protest in the country as providing “material support” to terrorists.
What else can they come up with? Lending fraud? Illegal possession of classified material? Sexual assault? Epstein? No, people wouldn’t believe one old guy could do all that!
Is witchcraft still a crime?
So good luck, prosecutors! These enterprising young lawyers will need to show some powerful creative writing chops to get this investigation off the ground, but they just need to get brainstorming and apply themselves. If you’re a line attorney hoping to score a federal judgeship at 28, consider pitching your case against George Soros to your supervisors!
Think of it like McSweeney’s… but also a gross violation of ethical duties.
Earlier: Justice Dept. Official Pushes Prosecutors to Investigate George Soros’s Foundation
Joe Patrice is a senior editor at Above the Law and co-host of Thinking Like A Lawyer. Feel free to email any tips, questions, or comments. Follow him on Twitter or Bluesky if you’re interested in law, politics, and a healthy dose of college sports news. Joe also serves as a Managing Director at RPN Executive Search.
The post DOJ Asks U.S. Attorneys To Invent Sham Reasons To Prosecute George Soros appeared first on Above the Law.
Who says lawyers have to sacrifice their creative side! While many attorneys find the daily grind of practicing law keeps them from their artistic passions, there are still avenues to keep legal eagles from letting that part of their brain atrophy one billable hour at a time. For example, consider joining the Department of Justice!
Yes, according to a report from the New York Times, lawyers in at least six U.S. Attorney’s Offices just received a memo from a senior DOJ official inviting them to flex those creative muscles and figure out how the administration can put George Soros in jail. Is there any reason to put Soros in jail? Not that anyone can tell! But Donald Trump has identified Soros as a political enemy, and in peak proto-Pinochet form, Trump wants his DOJ to put the aging philanthropist in jail.
Come with me and you’ll be
In a world of pure imagination
That comparison may seem like “Trump Derangement Syndrome,” a sort of wild hyperbole that takes Trump’s words out of context to assume the worst. Let’s check the exact quote before leaping to conclusions:
In reply to a question from NBC News about Soros, the president said that he “should be put in jail.”
Cryptic! The man truly is an enigma wrapped in a riddle wrapped in bronzer. He also suggested this could be a RICO case because he’s both not a lawyer and incredibly dumb.
In any event, federal prosecutors are now tasked with inventing charges to make the boss happy. He already posted-then-deleted a message excoriating Attorney General Bondi for not prosecuting his political enemies, so it’s time to get busy over there! Even if there’s no conceivable or, frankly, professionally ethical justification.
The official’s directive, a copy of which was viewed by The New York Times, goes as far as to list possible charges prosecutors could file, ranging from arson to material support of terrorism. The memo suggests department leaders are following orders from the president that specific people or groups be subject to criminal investigation — a major break from decades of past practice meant to insulate the Justice Department from political interference.
This is the practical extension of the White House decision to declare Antifa a domestic terrorism organization, allowing him to broadly accuse anyone left of Steve Bannon a terrorist member of the non-existent organization. And, critically, to accuse anyone giving money to any anti-authoritarian protest in the country as providing “material support” to terrorists.
What else can they come up with? Lending fraud? Illegal possession of classified material? Sexual assault? Epstein? No, people wouldn’t believe one old guy could do all that!
Is witchcraft still a crime?
So good luck, prosecutors! These enterprising young lawyers will need to show some powerful creative writing chops to get this investigation off the ground, but they just need to get brainstorming and apply themselves. If you’re a line attorney hoping to score a federal judgeship at 28, consider pitching your case against George Soros to your supervisors!
Think of it like McSweeney’s… but also a gross violation of ethical duties.
Earlier: Justice Dept. Official Pushes Prosecutors to Investigate George Soros’s Foundation
Joe Patrice is a senior editor at Above the Law and co-host of Thinking Like A Lawyer. Feel free to email any tips, questions, or comments. Follow him on Twitter or Bluesky if you’re interested in law, politics, and a healthy dose of college sports news. Joe also serves as a Managing Director at RPN Executive Search.
