As in-house lawyers, we are often called in when there are problems to solve and challenges to overcome. The phone rings. The meeting invite goes out. Something has gone sideways, and leadership needs everyone (including the in-house lawyer) at the table.
When you walk into that room, how and when you speak can be as important as the words you speak. I have learned this the hard way and watched others learn it too.
The instinct is to demonstrate value immediately — to prove you belong there, to show you understand the gravity of the situation, to fill the silence with analysis — but that instinct can work against you.
What are some things to keep in mind?
Your Legal Perspective Is Not The Only Perspective That Matters
This is hard for lawyers to accept. We are trained to spot issues, flag risks, and protect the organization. That is our job, but in a room full of people trying to solve a problem, legal risk is one consideration among many. There are operational realities, financial constraints, reputational concerns, and human factors that may not show up in a legal memo.
In my experience, it helps to get all the options on the table first. Let the business talk. Let the ideas flow. Then consider the legal implications and how they impact risk. You will be more effective (and more welcome) if you are seen as someone who helps the team think through options rather than someone who shuts them down before they start.
You Do Not Have To Be The Loudest Voice In The Room
In fact, that is not what leadership expects from the in-house counsel. Speak in low tones. Not animated. Not passionate. Confident. Start by answering the question asked. Do not overexplain. Less can be more. You do not need to repeat what you have heard in more detail just to show you were listening. You have nothing to prove. You are not the smartest person in the room. Do not act like you are.
I have seen lawyers lose credibility in seconds by talking too much, too fast, or too forcefully. The goal is not to dominate the conversation. The goal is to add value at the right moment, in the right way.
Listen More Than You Speak
This sounds simple. It is not.
Listening means more than waiting for your turn to talk. It means reading the room. It means watching for cues from your audience. It means noticing when someone is confused, frustrated, or checked out. It means noticing when the CEO glares at one of the team members. And, it means noticing when the energy shifts.
Give the people in the room time to digest what you have shared. Give them time to ask questions. Do not rush to fill every silence. Silence is not a problem to solve. Sometimes it is where the real thinking happens.
Stay Calm When Things Get Heated
Things can get heated. Decisions are hard. Stakes are high. People are stressed.
You do not have to match that energy. Be the calm voice in the room. Do not take it personally when someone pushes back or dismisses your concern. Your job is to provide perspective, not to win arguments.
The moment you become defensive or reactive, you lose something that is very hard to get back.
Trust Takes Time To Earn But Can Be Lost In An Instant
This is the part that stays with me. If you are invited into the room, you are already halfway there. Someone decided your perspective matters. Someone wants you at the table. That is not nothing.
Do not blow it when you get in there. Every interaction is a deposit or a withdrawal. Every time you show up prepared, measured, and helpful, you build trust. Every time you grandstand, overexplain, or make it about you, you chip away at what you have built.
The in-house lawyers who earn lasting influence are not the ones who talk the most or know the most. They are the ones who show up consistently, read the room accurately, and add value without needing credit.
How you show up matters. How you listen matters. How you speak (and when) matters more than you think.
Lisa Lang is an accomplished in-house lawyer and thought leader dedicated to empowering fellow legal professionals. She offers insights and resources tailored for in-house counsel through her website and blog, Why This, Not That™ (www.lawyerlisalang.com). Lisa actively engages with the legal community via LinkedIn, sharing her expertise and fostering meaningful connections. You can reach her at lisa@lawyerlisalang.com, connect on LinkedIn (https://www.linkedin.com/in/lawyerlisalang/).
The post How You Show Up In The Room Matters More Than You Think appeared first on Above the Law.
As in-house lawyers, we are often called in when there are problems to solve and challenges to overcome. The phone rings. The meeting invite goes out. Something has gone sideways, and leadership needs everyone (including the in-house lawyer) at the table.
When you walk into that room, how and when you speak can be as important as the words you speak. I have learned this the hard way and watched others learn it too.
The instinct is to demonstrate value immediately — to prove you belong there, to show you understand the gravity of the situation, to fill the silence with analysis — but that instinct can work against you.
What are some things to keep in mind?
Your Legal Perspective Is Not The Only Perspective That Matters
This is hard for lawyers to accept. We are trained to spot issues, flag risks, and protect the organization. That is our job, but in a room full of people trying to solve a problem, legal risk is one consideration among many. There are operational realities, financial constraints, reputational concerns, and human factors that may not show up in a legal memo.
In my experience, it helps to get all the options on the table first. Let the business talk. Let the ideas flow. Then consider the legal implications and how they impact risk. You will be more effective (and more welcome) if you are seen as someone who helps the team think through options rather than someone who shuts them down before they start.
You Do Not Have To Be The Loudest Voice In The Room
In fact, that is not what leadership expects from the in-house counsel. Speak in low tones. Not animated. Not passionate. Confident. Start by answering the question asked. Do not overexplain. Less can be more. You do not need to repeat what you have heard in more detail just to show you were listening. You have nothing to prove. You are not the smartest person in the room. Do not act like you are.
I have seen lawyers lose credibility in seconds by talking too much, too fast, or too forcefully. The goal is not to dominate the conversation. The goal is to add value at the right moment, in the right way.
Listen More Than You Speak
This sounds simple. It is not.
Listening means more than waiting for your turn to talk. It means reading the room. It means watching for cues from your audience. It means noticing when someone is confused, frustrated, or checked out. It means noticing when the CEO glares at one of the team members. And, it means noticing when the energy shifts.
Give the people in the room time to digest what you have shared. Give them time to ask questions. Do not rush to fill every silence. Silence is not a problem to solve. Sometimes it is where the real thinking happens.
Stay Calm When Things Get Heated
Things can get heated. Decisions are hard. Stakes are high. People are stressed.
You do not have to match that energy. Be the calm voice in the room. Do not take it personally when someone pushes back or dismisses your concern. Your job is to provide perspective, not to win arguments.
The moment you become defensive or reactive, you lose something that is very hard to get back.
Trust Takes Time To Earn But Can Be Lost In An Instant
This is the part that stays with me. If you are invited into the room, you are already halfway there. Someone decided your perspective matters. Someone wants you at the table. That is not nothing.
Do not blow it when you get in there. Every interaction is a deposit or a withdrawal. Every time you show up prepared, measured, and helpful, you build trust. Every time you grandstand, overexplain, or make it about you, you chip away at what you have built.
The in-house lawyers who earn lasting influence are not the ones who talk the most or know the most. They are the ones who show up consistently, read the room accurately, and add value without needing credit.
How you show up matters. How you listen matters. How you speak (and when) matters more than you think.
Lisa Lang is an accomplished in-house lawyer and thought leader dedicated to empowering fellow legal professionals. She offers insights and resources tailored for in-house counsel through her website and blog, Why This, Not That™ (www.lawyerlisalang.com). Lisa actively engages with the legal community via LinkedIn, sharing her expertise and fostering meaningful connections. You can reach her at [email protected], connect on LinkedIn (https://www.linkedin.com/in/lawyerlisalang/).
