What was Donald Trump thinking about the Jeffrey Epstein files?
Maybe this:
It’s the middle of 2024, and the Epstein files are important to my presidential campaign. My base thinks the files will prove that Democratic pedophiles run the country. I’m supposed to release the files, expose the pedophiles, and cleanse the country of the Democratic elite cabal.
Does anyone really believe that crap? Thank God for QAnon.
Anyway, I realize there’s a bunch of stuff in the Epstein files that makes me look pretty bad.
The heck with it! I’ll commit to release the files anyway. Maybe folks will have forgotten about Epstein by the time I’m inaugurated.
It’s now the summer of 2025, and people still remember the Epstein files.
What can I say now to avoid releasing the files, which contain that incriminating material?
Maybe I’ll say that we can’t release the files because they contain second- and third-hand information that may damage the reputation of innocent people.
Wait a minute; no one will believe that. Have you seen how much I care about the reputations of innocent people? Hell, I’ve been ordered to pay tens of millions of dollars to E. Jean Carroll for having defamed her. I’m not sure I should talk about protecting the reputations of innocent people.
What else can I say to avoid releasing the files?
Maybe I should say that the files will unfairly incriminate people. No. My base knows that the files are incriminating; that’s why people want to see the damn things. That won’t work.
Maybe I should say that I can’t release the Epstein files because they contain the names of underage victims of sexual abuse.
I don’t really care about underage girls. I used to go strolling around the dressing room of a Miss Teenage America pageant. But I’m not sure that excuse will work. If anyone really cares about young victims of sexual abuse, we could just redact the names of the children.
I guess there’s only one thing for me to do: Deny that there’s anything interesting in the Epstein files. My base will probably believe me — God, I love the deplorables! — and that will put the whole issue behind me.
Shoot! People aren’t believing me. They still want to see the files. I guess we’ve been talking about Epstein for too long. Even my base isn’t stupid enough to let me renege on my promise to release the files. And now the Democrats are piling on. What will I do?
Maybe I should say that I can’t release the Epstein files because they contain secret grand jury materials.
I sure don’t give a damn about grand jury materials. What the hell’s a grand jury, anyway? Besides, I’m immune from criminal prosecution, so they can’t prosecute me if I illegally release grand jury materials.
But I don’t even have to release the stuff! I’ll tell Pam Bondi to release “grand jury testimony,” if courts authorize it. The courts may not authorize it. Even if they do, the grand jury would have investigated only Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwell; prosecutors wouldn’t have asked any questions about me. So long as we release only “grand jury testimony,” and not the “Epstein files,” I’m probably okay.
Shoot! The Wall Street Journal is about to report on the birthday note that I allegedly sent to Epstein that suggests that I might allegedly know about his fondness for underage girls. What will I do now?
I’ll have my thugs call Rupert Murdoch and tell him not to publish!
Didn’t work.
I’ll have my thugs call the editor at the Journal and demand that she not publish!
Didn’t work.
I’ll threaten to sue the Journal! (I know that’s ridiculous, because a lawsuit would only draw attention to the issue, and discovery in the lawsuit would be horribly embarrassing to me, but what can I do? You have to threaten to sue, and generally follow through, to avoid looking weak.)
That didn’t work either.
What do I do now?
Fake news!
Anything that doesn’t flatter me is always fake news.
It’s a bifurcated world: There’s only flattering news and fake news. There are only judges who rule in my favor and judges who are corrupt, communist Democrats. I’ll just use the old fake news ploy: I’ll insist the birthday note to Epstein is a fake!
This’ll be tricky to pull off. The note is included with a bunch of others in a book that celebrated Epstein’s 50th birthday. The company that published the book probably has evidence that the contributors actually sent in their contributions. Scores of people who wrote other notes for Jeff will probably concede that their notes are real. Is my alleged note the only fake note? Who faked it, and when?
Jesus — Ghislaine Maxwell assembled the book for Jeff, and she’s still alive. She could testify that she didn’t concoct stuff to put in the book.
Screw it. Who gives a damn?
I’m gonna insist that the Journal concocted the note and somehow placed it in a book that was published 20 years ago. Maybe they knew I’d be elected president. Or maybe Obama, or Biden, or Comey concocted the note.
I haven’t worked this out yet, but one of those things should work.
What if they don’t work? Even my base might not be that stupid.
I guess, in the end, it won’t matter. I’ve been found liable for sexual assault (which, in the common meaning of the words, constituted rape). I’ve been accused of sexual assault by dozens of other women. My voice is on tape talking about grabbing women by the pussy. The whole world knows about Stormy Daniels.
None of that made any difference.
So the birthday note will be made public, and every thinking person will know that it’s real.
Of course it’s not just the note.
Epstein and I were “best friends” for a long, long time.
I fought pretty damn hard to keep the entire Epstein file from being made public, so there’s probably some other incriminating stuff in there, too.
The hell with it; I’ll be incriminated.
I can’t be prosecuted, even if there’s evidence of criminality in the files.
The Republicans in Congress sure aren’t going to impeach me over this.
I guess I’ll just have a stain on my reputation.
Another stain on my reputation?
I don’t even care if that’s fake news. It’s basically no news at all.
Mark Herrmann spent 17 years as a partner at a leading international law firm and later oversaw litigation, compliance and employment matters at a large international company. He is the author of The Curmudgeon’s Guide to Practicing Law and Drug and Device Product Liability Litigation Strategy (affiliate links). You can reach him by email at inhouse@abovethelaw.com.
The post Reading Trump’s Mind: The Epstein Files appeared first on Above the Law.
What was Donald Trump thinking about the Jeffrey Epstein files?
Maybe this:
It’s the middle of 2024, and the Epstein files are important to my presidential campaign. My base thinks the files will prove that Democratic pedophiles run the country. I’m supposed to release the files, expose the pedophiles, and cleanse the country of the Democratic elite cabal.
Does anyone really believe that crap? Thank God for QAnon.
Anyway, I realize there’s a bunch of stuff in the Epstein files that makes me look pretty bad.
The heck with it! I’ll commit to release the files anyway. Maybe folks will have forgotten about Epstein by the time I’m inaugurated.
It’s now the summer of 2025, and people still remember the Epstein files.
What can I say now to avoid releasing the files, which contain that incriminating material?
Maybe I’ll say that we can’t release the files because they contain second- and third-hand information that may damage the reputation of innocent people.
Wait a minute; no one will believe that. Have you seen how much I care about the reputations of innocent people? Hell, I’ve been ordered to pay tens of millions of dollars to E. Jean Carroll for having defamed her. I’m not sure I should talk about protecting the reputations of innocent people.
What else can I say to avoid releasing the files?
Maybe I should say that the files will unfairly incriminate people. No. My base knows that the files are incriminating; that’s why people want to see the damn things. That won’t work.
Maybe I should say that I can’t release the Epstein files because they contain the names of underage victims of sexual abuse.
I don’t really care about underage girls. I used to go strolling around the dressing room of a Miss Teenage America pageant. But I’m not sure that excuse will work. If anyone really cares about young victims of sexual abuse, we could just redact the names of the children.
I guess there’s only one thing for me to do: Deny that there’s anything interesting in the Epstein files. My base will probably believe me — God, I love the deplorables! — and that will put the whole issue behind me.
Shoot! People aren’t believing me. They still want to see the files. I guess we’ve been talking about Epstein for too long. Even my base isn’t stupid enough to let me renege on my promise to release the files. And now the Democrats are piling on. What will I do?
Maybe I should say that I can’t release the Epstein files because they contain secret grand jury materials.
I sure don’t give a damn about grand jury materials. What the hell’s a grand jury, anyway? Besides, I’m immune from criminal prosecution, so they can’t prosecute me if I illegally release grand jury materials.
But I don’t even have to release the stuff! I’ll tell Pam Bondi to release “grand jury testimony,” if courts authorize it. The courts may not authorize it. Even if they do, the grand jury would have investigated only Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwell; prosecutors wouldn’t have asked any questions about me. So long as we release only “grand jury testimony,” and not the “Epstein files,” I’m probably okay.
Shoot! The Wall Street Journal is about to report on the birthday note that I allegedly sent to Epstein that suggests that I might allegedly know about his fondness for underage girls. What will I do now?
I’ll have my thugs call Rupert Murdoch and tell him not to publish!
Didn’t work.
I’ll have my thugs call the editor at the Journal and demand that she not publish!
Didn’t work.
I’ll threaten to sue the Journal! (I know that’s ridiculous, because a lawsuit would only draw attention to the issue, and discovery in the lawsuit would be horribly embarrassing to me, but what can I do? You have to threaten to sue, and generally follow through, to avoid looking weak.)
That didn’t work either.
What do I do now?
Fake news!
Anything that doesn’t flatter me is always fake news.
It’s a bifurcated world: There’s only flattering news and fake news. There are only judges who rule in my favor and judges who are corrupt, communist Democrats. I’ll just use the old fake news ploy: I’ll insist the birthday note to Epstein is a fake!
This’ll be tricky to pull off. The note is included with a bunch of others in a book that celebrated Epstein’s 50th birthday. The company that published the book probably has evidence that the contributors actually sent in their contributions. Scores of people who wrote other notes for Jeff will probably concede that their notes are real. Is my alleged note the only fake note? Who faked it, and when?
Jesus — Ghislaine Maxwell assembled the book for Jeff, and she’s still alive. She could testify that she didn’t concoct stuff to put in the book.
Screw it. Who gives a damn?
I’m gonna insist that the Journal concocted the note and somehow placed it in a book that was published 20 years ago. Maybe they knew I’d be elected president. Or maybe Obama, or Biden, or Comey concocted the note.
I haven’t worked this out yet, but one of those things should work.
What if they don’t work? Even my base might not be that stupid.
I guess, in the end, it won’t matter. I’ve been found liable for sexual assault (which, in the common meaning of the words, constituted rape). I’ve been accused of sexual assault by dozens of other women. My voice is on tape talking about grabbing women by the pussy. The whole world knows about Stormy Daniels.
None of that made any difference.
So the birthday note will be made public, and every thinking person will know that it’s real.
Of course it’s not just the note.
Epstein and I were “best friends” for a long, long time.
I fought pretty damn hard to keep the entire Epstein file from being made public, so there’s probably some other incriminating stuff in there, too.
The hell with it; I’ll be incriminated.
I can’t be prosecuted, even if there’s evidence of criminality in the files.
The Republicans in Congress sure aren’t going to impeach me over this.
I guess I’ll just have a stain on my reputation.
Another stain on my reputation?
I don’t even care if that’s fake news. It’s basically no news at all.
Mark Herrmann spent 17 years as a partner at a leading international law firm and later oversaw litigation, compliance and employment matters at a large international company. He is the author of The Curmudgeon’s Guide to Practicing Law and Drug and Device Product Liability Litigation Strategy (affiliate links). You can reach him by email at inhouse@abovethelaw.com.
The post Reading Trump’s Mind: The Epstein Files appeared first on Above the Law.
